


Permanent Reverie

by thefangirlingdead



Series: It's Not Living (If It's Not With You) - Universe [9]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alcohol, Anal Sex, Angst, Backstory, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, Dreams, Drug Use, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Bonding, Fix-It, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, M/M, Post-Canon Fix-It, Relapse, Suicidal Thoughts, Time Travel Fix-It
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2020-01-07 06:54:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 31,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18405431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thefangirlingdead/pseuds/thefangirlingdead
Summary: The Umbrella Academy finally returns to their original timeline to save the world and shortly after, things begin to return to a weird sort of normal. Or at least, as normal as things can be for them.For Five, it means he can make up for lost time and help his siblings, specifically Klaus, recover.(Or, Five formulates a plan to give Klaus the happy ending he deserves)





	1. Even Though This Life, This Love Is Brief I've Got Some People Who Carry Me

**Author's Note:**

> Wow okay. So. Where do I begin?
> 
> First off, thank you to EVERYONE who has read, commented, left kudos on or bookmarked this long-ass series. Seriously, you are all the reason I somehow created all of this so fast and stayed so excited about it! 
> 
> Second, this is the beginning of the end! For the foreseeable future, these next three chapters are going to be the LAST three chapters of [It's Not living (If It's Not With You)](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1295501) unless another idea hits me and I need to run with it. I really wanted to give this a nice big, epic ending, so I hope this lives up to it! 
> 
> For this first chapter, I really felt the need to write things from Five's perspective. I really hope it translates well. I just felt that, in order to tell the story in the way I wanted to, we needed to see things from his point of view. Definitely challenging writing about Klaus and Dave's relationship from a third point of view, but it was also a ton of fun! I'm planning on writing the next two chapters from Klaus and Dave's perspective, though! 
> 
> I don't want to give too much away, so there will be more notes at the end. Enjoy! 
> 
> _I couldn't tell you enough that I'm sorry_  
>  _And no, you couldn't tell me enough that you loved me_  
>  _She's bringing the moon and the stars to me_  
>  _Damn permanent reverie_
> 
>  _And even though this life, this love is brief_  
>  _I've got some people who carry me_  
>  \- [For Island Fires And Family](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EfE4W60VoA) \- Dermot Kennedy

This is probably the stupidest, most reckless thing that Five has ever done, and he’s done some questionable shit in his too-long, thirteen year old life. 

But he’s getting ahead of himself. 

First, they save the world. After over a year in the pocket universe, training and healing and formulating a plan that involves the  _ least _ amount of damage to their original timeline, they go back, and they save the world like the good little superheroes that daddy trained them to be, with no help from the man himself,  _ thankyouverymuch.  _ It’s kind of surreal, actually. It’s something they’ve been working toward for over a year, something that they were always destined to do, but when it actually happens, it doesn’t feel real. It’s too easy, but they succeed with limited injuries,  _ no _ casualties (thank  _ fuck _ ) and the timeline relatively intact (to Diego’s heartache, Eudora Patch still has to die, but to everyone’s relief, Harold Jenkins does too).

They save the world, and for the week that follows, things don’t seem real. Everything returns to some sort of weird normal, the Academy still in tact, Grace and Pogo still very much alive, and each of the siblings spend the following days and even weeks on pins and needles, as if they think that things will come tumbling down if they’re not constantly on edge, keeping watch for the next threat. 

But nothing happens. 

A month after the not-end of the world, everything begins to return to normal, even if it doesn’t feel right. It’s like coming home from war and adjusting to normal, everyday life again… and just that thought alone gets Five thinking about Klaus. 

Obviously, saving the world was a group effort, especially on Vanya and Allison’s part, but honestly, if it weren’t for Klaus sacrificing a whole hell of a lot, they wouldn’t be where they are now. Over the past year, Five has seen Klaus work harder than he has in his entire life. He watches as Klaus struggles to get sober and as he celebrates six month clean from all drugs and alcohol. He watches as Klaus discovers new powers and as he harnesses them with excitement, even if it doesn’t always come easy. It’s an uphill battle, that’s for sure, but Klaus never gives up, even when it would be easy to just throw in the towel and walk away. He never signed up for this shit -  _ none of them did _ \- but Klaus works his ass off, and by the time they’re living through that fateful day once more, he is able to keep Ben corporeal for nearly an entire day,  _ and  _ he’s got quite the grip on his telekinesis. 

And then there’s  _ Dave. _ Dave, always on the sideline, cheering Klaus on, serving as an extension of his support system, proud and excited and hopelessly in love. So Five isn’t surprised when Klaus comes to him, just a couple of weeks before they’re due to make the jump back to their original timeline to try to stop the apocalypse, concerned about what might become of Dave when they  _ do _ go back.

_ “I need to ask you something,” Klaus had said one night, while the two of them sat down in the kitchen together, both unable to sleep. Five had been nursing a cup of coffee when Klaus had wandered in, clad in nothing but a silk bathrobe and fuzzy slippers, lit cigarette in hand.  _

_ “Shoot,” Five had muttered. He didn’t want to talk, didn’t want to think, but if it would distract him from the horrible images and nightmares plaguing his brain, then he’d welcome it with open arms.  _

_ “I know you said that you were barely able to bring all seven of us here in the first place,” Klaus started, “So do you think…” _

_ “Bringing Dave home will be no problem,” Five had insisted, before Klaus could even finish his thought.  _

_ He couldn’t help but notice the way Klaus’ features seemed to relax as soon as the words left his mouth, either. It took him a moment to recover before he asked, “How do you know?” _

_ “You’re not the only one who’s been training,” Five had insisted. “I’m confident that I’ll be able to do it.” _

_ “Great!” Klaus had replied then. “That’s… great. I - thank you, Five.” _

_ Five had nodded. “Don’t mention it.”  _

_ But only a few minutes had gone by before Klaus was asking another question, and Five already knew what he was going to say before the words came out of his mouth.  _

_ “Do you think that maybe, would you be able to - if we went back, could we -” _

_ “No,” Five had answered immediately, cold and hard. His face and tone softened immediately when he saw the look of heartbreak and disappointment evident on Klaus’ face.  _

_ “I’m sorry,” he had added, offering Klaus a sympathetic look, “You know if I could I would, but we both know that the future would be altered too much if he survived.” _

_ In other words, he needed Klaus to hit his lowest point in order to pick himself back up again.  _

_ Klaus had nodded in somber understanding then, resigned and defeated. “Right. Right, yeah. It makes sense, I just figured I’d ask…” _

_ “I promise, if I could, I would,” Five had repeated, and the reassuring smile that Klaus had given him broke his heart.  _

_ “I know you would. Thanks, Five.”  _

Go figure that his brother would go and fall in love with a man from the 1960’s that he could never bring back home, then continue their relationship once he was able to conjure his ghost. It was weird and fucked up, but typical of Klaus, or any of the Hargreeves kids for that matter. They’re  _ all _ a little fucked up. Hell, it’s the reason Five spent over thirty years with Delores. It’s what causes Vanya to put down the violin for a while, even though it’s the only thing that has given her joy and solace since they were kids. It’s what has Luther following Allison like a lost puppy back to California when she eventually leaves, staying by her side to support her during her required therapy sessions and scheduled visitations with Claire. They’re all some sort of fucked up in their own way, which is why Diego keeps playing vigilante after the end of the world, even after Klaus manages to conjure Patch, who begs him to stop and lead a normal life. And it’s why, only a few weeks after the end of the world, he, Klaus and Diego move back into their childhood home, the place that they endured so much abuse and neglect and anguish, because they all have nowhere else to go. 

They’re  _ all _ a little fucked up, but they’re working through it, and Five is determined to help his siblings recover, to be there for them in a way he hasn’t been for the past seventeen years. And  _ that’s  _ eventually how he gets the idea to do something for Klaus. 

A few months after they return to save the world, it isn’t unnatural for the Academy to be relatively quiet on most nights. When it’s apparent that there are no other immediate threats to humanity, Allison makes the decision to eventually return to California to work on gaining custody of Claire, and Luther is quick to join her, to absolutely nobody’s surprise. And while she stays at the Academy for a few weeks, Vanya also decides to return to her apartment eventually, promising to check in with Allison or Five at least once a day, but insisting that she needs some sense of normalcy in her life to get back on her feet. So, with more than half of the siblings either gone or dead (no offense, Ben), that leaves only Five, Diego and Klaus to share the house alongside Grace and Pogo, and surprisingly, they end up making relatively good roommates.

One Tuesday night in particular, like most nights nowadays, it’s quiet throughout the house. When Five eventually wanders out of his makeshift office and bedroom - he had taken over one of the guest bedrooms on an upper level of the house shortly after coming back because something about sleeping in his childhood bedroom just didn’t sit right - it’s to an empty hallway and quiet floor when he makes his way toward both Diego and Klaus’ bedrooms. Like Five, his brothers have both done their part to spruce things up a bit, making their own rooms and the Academy in general feel a bit more  _ homey  _ (Klaus, for instance, immediately uses some of his inheritance money to buy a new, bigger bed on top of a new wardrobe) but tonight, neither of them can be found in their newly remodeled bedrooms. 

Assuming that Diego is out, as he is on most weeknights, Five decides that now is as good of a time as ever, and sets out on finding Klaus (and more importantly  _ Dave _ ) to have a quick chat. Because, well… Five has a  _ plan. _

It’s something that he’s been formulating for a few weeks, born out of frustration and guilt and love for his brother, but before he implements it - before he jumps in with both feet, unable to turn back - he needs to make sure he’s making the right choice. And in order to do that, Five needs to talk to Dave. Alone. 

After just a little bit of searching and remembering an overheard conversation from earlier in the day, Five eventually finds Klaus and Dave are holed up in their makeshift theatre room on one of the lower floors of the Academy, in the midst of a  _ Lord of the Rings _ marathon. “Oh, you  _ gotta _ see this shit,” he had heard Klaus saying excitedly earlier that afternoon when he suggested the movies to Dave. 

(The theatre room had been Klaus’ idea as well, when he, Diego and Five began discussing remodeling the house.  _ “The old man never let us have any fun,” _ Klaus had muttered as he purchased a ridiculously oversized television for the room,  _ “He’d be rolling in his grave if he saw this. Hell, maybe I should conjure him, just so he can.” _ )

So in between movies, Five decides that it’s  _ now or never,  _ and jumps into the basement just as Klaus is rising from his seat, apparently taking a quick intermission. The sight of Five appearing so suddenly in the dimly lit room causes Klaus to nearly jump out of his skin. One would think he’d be used to it by now. 

_ “Christ, Five,” _ Klaus gasps, a hand on his chest, holding onto the back of a sofa for support, “You nearly gave me a heart attack.”

“You’d survive,” Five retorts, waving off Klaus’ overacted surprise. It only takes one glance before he notices that Dave is corporeal, and  _ good, _ this will be a lot easier than he thought. 

Seemingly noticing that Five is unusually quiet, Klaus cocks his head to the side, pausing where he stands, just next to the sofa. “What can we do for you?” he asks. 

_ Might as well do it.  _

“Actually…” Five glances between Klaus and Dave, trying to figure out how to word it, what to say to get just a few moments alone with Dave. Uncharacteristically, he decides that honesty is the best policy. “I just need to talk to Dave.”

Five absolutely expects the look of surprise that graces his brother’s features at that, and he simply raises his own eyebrows in return, as if to prove his point. Dave, bless his heart, looks surprised and confused as well, but he does his best to school his features, glancing between the two of them. 

He honestly expects some sort of sarcastic remark, some witty comment in return, but instead, after a moment, Klaus just shrugs. “Oh,  _ okay,” _ he mutters. “I uh… I was going to go make some popcorn anyway. I’ll be right back.”

Then, after a moment, Five is alone with Dave for the first time in his life. Silently thankful that Klaus is strong enough to keep him corporal with ease at this point, Five turns to his brother’s dead boyfriend, trying to figure out the right way to say what he needs to say. Words have never really been Five’s strong point. Sure, he’s a master assassin, he’s incredibly intelligent and he’s cunning as hell, but emotional conversations have never come easy to him. He’ll blame that on his shitty childhood, the decades that he lived in an apocalyptic wasteland and the years of murdering innocent people that followed. 

But it appears that Dave isn’t intimidated by Five’s presence as he leans forward in his seat after just a few quiet seconds, offering Five a smile and asking, “What did you want to talk about?”

And  _ shit. _ This was much easier in his head, planning out this conversation. He had every key point bookmarked, set aside to bring up to Dave. He wanted to be concise and clear with his intentions, his plan, but now, looking at Dave and seeing the  _ real _ person behind the corporeal spirit in front of him, all of those thoughts fly out the window.

How do you tell your brother’s boyfriend that you want to try to bring him back from the dead, but if you fuck it up, they might never get to see each other again? That’s obviously something that you  _ have  _ to have a conversation about and likely get consent to try, but he doesn’t even know where to begin. 

Five clears his throat. “Well, uh - I -” he sighs, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose. This seemed so much easier in his head. Instead of getting straight to the point, as he initially had planned, Five finds himself saying, “You and Klaus… You’re - you really love each other.”

It isn’t a question, but Five feels like it needs to be said. He just wants to know that he’s doing the right thing here, that he isn’t going to fuck this up. This is so much harder than just pulling a trigger and moving on to the next one. 

Dave’s smile slips for a moment, as soon as the words leave Five’s mouth. A look of confusion passes over his face as he eyes Five carefully, apparently trying to figure out just what he’s getting at, before he nods. “We do,” he answers at last, voice confident. “Your brother… he’s -” he laughs, shaking his head, “It’s hard to remember what my life was like before him, if I’m being honest.”

Five offers Dave a gentle smile. “He has that effect on people.” 

Then, Five makes the decision to move, crossing the room and closing the empty space between them to sit down on the sofa next to Dave. He doesn’t glance at him quite yet again, instead staring down at his hands for a long moment. 

“You know… I haven’t been here, for a  _ lot _ of Klaus’ life,” Five starts, unsure of where he’s going with this. He barely has any control of the words leaving his mouth, but he knows that they need to be said.  _ “But,  _ I remember what he was like before I left. We were only thirteen, and he already had  _ so much  _ shit to deal with… I can’t even begin to imagine everything -”

Five cuts himself off. He  _ can _ begin to imagine, because he remembers the way that Klaus cried when Reginald dragged him back from training sessions in the middle of the night. Five was never sure where exactly their father took him, but with their rooms just a few doors down from each other, he knew it wasn’t good. Klaus would sob until sleep took him or until he got fucked up enough to numb the demons, whichever came first. Five shakes the ugly memory from his head.

“When I came back, I was hoping that maybe, he found a way to cope that wasn’t through drugs and alcohol, but I can’t say I was surprised. But you…” Five shakes his head, glancing up at Dave, “I don’t know how you do it, but you’ve helped him in ways that none of us have been able to. He really loves you.” 

Dave is quiet for a moment, as if taking in all of Five’s words before he murmurs, softly, “He’s something else.”

“Ha,” Five shakes his head, a smile pulling on his lips. “You can say that again.”

And for a moment, it’s quiet. Five’s gaze slips back to his hands while he tries to form the right words to say, the right questions to ask. He had this planned out so well before, but it’s different, sitting next to Dave and trying to find a way to explain his plan before Klaus returns. 

To Dave’s credit, he doesn’t push Five, either. It’s apparent that there’s  _ something  _ that Five wants to talk about, but Dave doesn’t urge him to spit it out and ask whatever he planned on asking. So thankfully, it gives him a few moments to find the right words to say. They weren’t the ones he was planning, but still, it’s better than nothing. 

“If you…” Five swallows, steeling himself. “If you knew then, what you know now… powers, fucked up family, apocalypse and  _ everything, _ would you have come back here with Klaus, had he asked?”

To his surprise, Dave’s answer is immediate. “In a heartbeat.”

Five glances up at that, eyes searching Dave for any sign of hesitation. He finds none. 

“You didn’t have any family waiting for you?” Five asks, “No life back home?”

Dave looks down, his face hard, eyes far away for just a moment, and Five can’t help but wonder what his life was like before  _ all of this. _ Before war and meeting Klaus and  _ everything. _

“No,” Dave’s voice shakes him from his thoughts. “My uh… my mom passed away when I was fifteen and although my dad and I were relatively close, we hadn’t spoken in a few years…”

Five nods, understanding. He knows that he’s not the only person with a broken family, that other people were capable of going through some traumatic shit, of becoming estranged from their family. Not just him. 

When Dave continues, his voice is a bit quieter, softer. “I had an older brother that I’d talk to occasionally and my little sister back home - I  _ do _ miss her quite a lot… But to answer your question, no. I didn’t really have much to go back to.” 

_ Shit. _ What do you say to that? Five is used to dealing with his own fucked up childhood, his own messed up life, but to hear Dave say that he would leave everything behind for Klaus, that he didn’t have a family worth returning to, well… there aren’t any comforting words to fix that. 

Thankfully, he doesn’t have to say anything before Dave is speaking again. 

“We used to talk about it, you know,” he murmurs, a smile pulling on his lips now. “Klaus would always ask me,  _ if you could leave right now and start over, would you?” _ Dave laughs, doing his best impression of Five’s eccentric brother. “I didn’t think he meant  _ literally, _ obviously. I thought he was just daydreaming, waiting til’ we were done with our tour. We’d talk about California, maybe Nevada or even Montana… get some land, a place of our own…”

Dave trails off and lets the implication of his words hang in the air for a few quiet moments, quiet classical music filling the silence as the menu screen for the _Lord of the Rings_ DVD plays on repeat in the background. And it’s  _ then _ that the reality of this really hits Five. He knew that Klaus cared for Dave, and he knew that what the two of them had was serious, he just didn’t think…

Well, he didn’t realize  _ just _ how close Klaus and Dave had been back in Vietnam. But if they were talking about getting a place together, leaving everything behind… then maybe this plan of his isn’t as risky as it seems. 

“He stole the briefcase once, to go back and get you.” Five isn’t sure what possesses him to say it, but suddenly, he wants Dave to know just how bad Klaus wanted him here. “I told him how badly it could fuck up the timeline, how you probably wouldn’t survive through the end of the world anyway and he still -” Five cuts himself off, shaking his head fondly. 

Dave huffs out a soft laugh. “Sounds like something he’d do.”

“Stubborn shit,” Five agrees with a smile. “But he loves you, you know.”

“I do,” Dave replies with a soft smile. 

“For the record, Dave, I wish he would have gone through with it,” Five admits after a moment. “It would be nice to have some normalcy around here.”

Dave can’t help but laugh at that. “Bringing your boyfriend from 1968 to the future is hardly normal.” 

“It’s  _ our _ kind of normal,” Five retorts with a snort. 

It’s then that Klaus finally makes his presence known as he steps (stumbles) into the room, balancing a few drinks in one hand and a comically large bowl of popcorn in his other arm. Five and Dave both turn to glance in his direction, their emotional little moment broken, and Klaus offers them both a lopsided smile. 

“Made some milkshakes while you guys were chatting,” Klaus says in greeting, apparently oblivious to the heavy energy in the room. “You want one?”

It isn’t until he really _looks_ at both his brother and his boyfriend, reading the room, that he raises an eyebrow, pausing where he stands just a few feet away. “Woah, you guys good? It feels  _ way _ too serious in here.”

“We’re good,” Dave assures with a smile, standing and reaching out to take the bowl of popcorn from Klaus’ hands. There has to be at least three bags of cheap popcorn filling the massive bowl, and Five can’t help but wonder how Klaus is going to eat it all. Can corporeal ghosts even eat? “He’s just making sure I’m treating you right.”

“Aww,  _ Five, you do care!”  _ Klaus exclaims. He reaches out, ruffling Five’s hair before offering him one of the milkshakes. “I  _ knew _ this whole tough guy exterior was just a front.”

Five rolls his eyes, but despite himself, he reaches out and grabs the milkshake from Klaus. “Don’t you have another movie to watch?”

“Two, actually!” Klaus replies excitedly, flopping down onto the sofa on the other side of Dave. “ _The Two Towers_ is next, then _Return of the King_. We’re thinking about doing _The Hobbit_ if we’re feeling up for it, but I have a feeling this guy is a purist, so we’ll see. You’re welcome to join us! It’ll be great for some  _ family bonding,  _ or whatever.”

Five nods, pretending to understand exactly everything Klaus has just explained, although sometimes, he feels like Dave - a man out of time. There’s a lot that he missed, like watching the full  _ Lord of the Rings _ trilogy with his siblings, or even  _ knowing _ that they made a movie based off of  _ The Hobbit.  _ He  _ does _ remember sneaking out of the house as kids to see  _ The Fellowship of the Ring _ and  _ The Two Towers _ when they were in theatres, but he was gone before the third movie came out, and while he’d like to stay and watch it with Klaus and Dave, he also wants to give them their space. That, and he has some planning to do. 

“Oh, you should have seen how  _ livid _ Reggie was when he caught us sneaking back in that night,” Klaus is saying to Dave now, a wild grin plastered across his face, “He lost his fucking mind… The only one who didn’t sneak out was Luther, and he didn’t even know how to punish all of us.”

“I think he nearly had a heart attack when he found out it was Ben’s idea,” Five muses, a smile pulling at his lips, too. He remembers the night clear as day, remembers how disappointed and angry and flustered their father had been upon finding the children piling in though Klaus’ open window. 

“Yeah, can you imagine that?” Klaus agrees, turning to Dave again, “Benny, such a bookworm… he was  _ dying _ to see these movies.”

“And they lived up to his expectations, for the most part,” Five agrees, “We couldn’t get him to stop talking about it for weeks.”

“So what’ll it be?” Klaus says finally, turning to Five again, “Come on, it’ll be just like old times.”

And  _ fuck _ , Five wants nothing more than to spend the evening holed up in this room with Klaus and Dave, reliving his childhood and watching the _Lord of the Rings_ … but he has work to do. So, with a sigh, he shakes his head. “I have a few things to do tonight,” he says by way of explanation. 

“Aww,  _ come on,”  _ Klaus insists, “You can take one night off.”

“Raincheck,” Five insists. Finally, he rises from his seat on the sofa. “You two enjoy yourselves, though. Just…  _ keep quiet, _ when you inevitably decide to stop watching the movie.”

Klaus chuckles. “No promises, little bro.”

It’s an endearing nickname, really, even though Five has over forty years on him. But Five doesn’t argue that right now. Instead, with a shake of his head, he’s blinking out of sight, and from the other end of the house a few seconds later, he can faintly hear Klaus calling after him. 

_ “Five! You wanna jump to the store and get us a blonde wig? I’m thinking of some Legolas roleplay! Come on!” _

But Five is already making his way to the infirmary, mind racing, hands trembling. He knows what he needs to do, and it’s reckless and risky and could quite possibly do more harm than good… but it’s worth it. He just has a few things to finalize before making the jump.

* * *

 

_This is probably the stupidest, most reckless thing that Five has ever done, and he’s done some questionable shit in his too-long, thirteen-year-old life._

At least, that’s the first thought that crosses Five's mind as soon as he teleports back in time. The second is how truly horrifying war really is. 

Sure, Five has seen his fair share of battlefields in his time with The Commission - as it turns out, they’re some of the easiest locations to eliminate a target without being noticed - but he has always seen them from a safe distance, a briefcase nearby for easy extraction. 

Never has he witnessed war like this - in the body of a thirteen year old boy, down in the trenches, dodging bullets and watching as strangers around him call out for their comrades, scream in pain, mumble out words of prayer and forgiveness as they take aim and shoot to kill, or pleas of survival as they bleed out, cold and alone. In the chaos, he goes relatively unnoticed, which is ideal, because he’s on a mission, and he can’t have any distractions. Get in and get out. That was his plan.

But first, he has to find him.

Five stays low, stays out of sight, keeping his spatial jumps to a minimum both because he doesn’t want to hit his threshold and get stuck here, and also because he doesn’t want to draw attention to himself. He knows that he has to be around here somewhere, and he’s certain that he got the date right, but as he searches the dark, chaotic landscape, the sound of gunfire, mortars and aircraft ringing in his ears, he starts to become discouraged. 

At least, until he hears a voice. 

_ “Christ on a cracker! That was a close one, huh Dave?” _

Five  _ knows _ that voice. Has known that voice his entire life, in one way or another. He heard that voice whisper childish secrets to him when they were just eight years old, heard it crying out in the night when they were teenagers, when the ghosts wouldn’t leave him alone, and it was one of the first voices he heard when he first returned to his family after so many years. 

_ Klaus. _

Five knows that he has to be close, but it’s still too soon. With Klaus nearby, he can’t make his presence known yet without running the risk of being seen. So he holds back. He searches for his brother (and most likely Dave) in the darkness, but he stays low. Stays hidden.

When he finally lays eyes on Klaus, he isn’t prepared for the sight before him. 

_ “Hey, Dave… Look at me. Look at me.” _

Oh.

Five knew that Klaus had been there when Dave had passed, or at least, he assumed as much, considering they were at  _ war _ and all, but he didn’t realize the severity (or the intimacy) or the situation. He didn’t expect Klaus to be there, right next to Dave when he died. He didn’t expect to see his own brother, hands trembling, pressing against Dave’s chest, trying to keep the blood in, trying to keep him alive, screaming for a medic. 

_ Fuck. _ If he would have known…

_ “Hey, hey, look at me… Please, please stay with me, Dave…” _

Klaus’ voice is desperate, frantic… scared. And it absolutely breaks Five’s heart. 

In this instant, he wants nothing more than to go back just five minutes, just a little bit earlier, to stop any of this from ever happening, to stop his brother from experiencing this pain. 

But he can’t. He can’t without completely altering the timeline, and he knows it. That’s why he’s here. That’s why he has to wait. 

Time ticks by, and Five watches, with tears in his eyes, as Klaus cradles Dave’s body as the life slips from him, murmuring words of love, pleas to  _ just hang on, stay alive _ in his ear, pressing desperate kisses to his forehead. Time ticks by, and Five can’t help but wonder how Klaus ever came back from something from this, how he ever managed to pick up the pieces and move forward after experiencing this, watching the person you love die in your arms.

Then, he’s reminded of a conversation that he and Klaus had, shortly after Klaus had returned without the briefcase, bloody and bruised, with a far away look in his eyes. And Five remembers the way he acted towards Klaus then - frustrated, angry and disappointed. If his calculations are right, Klaus had only returned maybe an hour or two before that conversation. 

How much time had passed between now and then? How long was it, after Dave’s death, that Five had been berating him for destroying the briefcase, without any regard for Klaus and what he might have just gone through?

Immediately, Five wants to go back again and right those wrongs, give Klaus the love and respect he deserved, but he can’t. He has to focus. 

Five watches as the life slips from Dave, watches as Klaus completely  _ falls apart,  _ sobbing into Dave's still form, and he itches to move, to  _ do something, _ because his window of time is closing, slipping past him with each second. But he  _ can’t. _ Not yet.

_ Then,  _ a stranger is approaching Klaus, hauling him up by his armpits, dragging him away, even as Klaus attempts to hold onto Dave’s body, even as Klaus reaches out, ripping Dave’s dog tags from his neck, the chain snapping in his grip. 

_ “Come on, Hargreeves, move out!” _

Klaus screams as he’s dragged away, fighting against his fellow soldiers, but eventually, he disappears into the darkness, and Five takes his chance.

He moves quickly, jumping through space to make up for lost time, until he’s positioned just above Dave’s still form. It’s jarring, seeing him like this, the way Klaus last saw him, bloodied and broken, and for the briefest moment, Five freezes, worried that he’s making the wrong choice. Worried that he’s going to mess everything up.

But then, he remembers Klaus. He remembers the absolute  _ heartbreak _ on Klaus’ face as he cradled Dave in his arms. He remembers the pure  _ joy _ in his eyes when he was able to make Dave corporeal during training for the first time, the way he eventually sprinted across the room and into Dave’s arms, shortly after Five had introduced himself to him. And he remembers the ease at which Klaus slipped into a routine with Dave, after coming home and saving the world, seemingly uncaring that Dave was a ghost, as long as he got to spend time with him. He remembers the love in Klaus’ eyes every time he saw him sneaking a glance at Dave, and in that moment, he decides that it’s worth it. It’s a risky move, but whatever happens, Klaus is worth it. 

So Five is quick to pull the syringe from his pocket, checking it quickly before positioning it over Dave’s chest. If he’s done the math right, this  _ should _ work without any complications, even though there  _ has _ been some time between Dave’s passing and now, but that thought alone isn’t enough to stop Five’s hand from trembling. He takes a few deep breaths to calm himself, steeling his nerves, then takes the plunge.

_ “Please work, please work…” _

Five repeats the words to himself like a mantra as he injects Dave with the serum, eyes squeezing shut out of fear that he misjudged this, that he might mess this up. And for a moment, time seems to stand still. Heart hammering in his chest, Five suddenly feels the same way he has in the past, when The Handler has stopped time, but he knows that’s not happening, not now. 

No, all around him, the world keeps spinning, the war keeps raging on, but in this foxhole, time seems to stand still while Five holds his breath, praying to whichever god will listen that this works. 

And then, just when Five’s lungs begin to burn, just when he starts to worry that maybe, he got too cocky, that he messed the formula up and it isn’t going to work, Dave takes a gasping breath. 


	2. A Spot In The Mountains

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo, remember how I said that this was going to be 3 chapters and it might take me a while to get updates up? Well, I ended up doing what I normally do and word-vomited this short little interlude and needed to post it now because of feelings. So NOW, this is going to be four chapters long. Whoops! 
> 
> Honestly, I've just been listening to The Midnight a lot lately and their song ["America 2"](https://themidnight.bandcamp.com/track/america-2) kind of inspired this chapter a little bit, so go listen to it while you read this. 
> 
> Per usual, there are some more notes at the end. 
> 
> _All I ever wanted was a spot in the mountains_   
>  _With an a-frame cabin and nobody counting our days_   
>  _Or cursing or praising on name_   
>  _But the best we could do is to enter the void_   
>  _Like a wide-eyed child waking up to the noise of East Harlem_   
>  _Don’t they see that we’re starving?_

Time is… strange. 

For the majority of Dave’s life, he saw time as most people do - as a linear thing with a beginning, middle and eventual end for all living things. Honestly, he never really gave it much thought, unless it was something that he needed to pay attention to. For instance, as a kid, he knew that it took him precisely thirty-eight minutes to walk to school in the morning, and a little bit longer to get home if he took a detour by his friend Michael’s house. By the time he was through basic training, he could easily run an eight-minute mile. In a pinch, he could be up and out of his cot and fully clothed in under a minute. And on nights that he was on watch, those eight hours seemed to tick by at a torturously slow pace. 

But then, Klaus Hargreeves enters his life, and everything he knows about time seems to warp around him. With Klaus by his side (as he tends to be most nights, he generally has trouble sleeping and joins Dave) eight hours on watch fly by with ease. When Klaus spares him a meaningful glance or a small smile when nobody else is looking, time seems to slow down, and when they kiss, it stops altogether. Ten months with Klaus seem to go by in the blink of an eye, but somehow, those ten months also feel like  _ years _ as they get to know each other and eventually, fall helplessly in love.

So yeah, time is a strange, fickle thing, but Dave doesn’t truly realize the extent of it until after he dies. And  _ fuck, _ time seems to stretch and warp when he dies, too. Although he’s certain that it doesn’t last long - he’s seen other men bleed out in just minutes, before - time seems to slow to a glacial pace as he gasps for air in Klaus’ arms, trying to offer him words of comfort, of love before he inevitably passes. Dave  _ knows _ that he’s dying, but it doesn’t feel how he expected. Sure, the pain is worse than anything else he has ever felt before , but his life doesn’t flash before his eyes, as everyone said it would. Instead, it plays out like a theatrical, feature-length film as time stretches impossibly before him.

Then, he dies, and time all but seems to stop. 

Time doesn’t necessarily exist when you’re dead. Time is all about growth, change, rebirth and renewal, and well… none of that is possible when you’re dead. Sure, Dave  _ knows _ that he’s dead - there’s  _ some _ sort of consciousness there - but time doesn’t move at the same pace as it did when he was alive.

Dave only really regains his grasp on time and reality when he finds Klaus again, and even then, it’s strange. He knows that, in reality, fifty years have passed between his death and the moment he sees Klaus again, but it feels as if it goes by in the blink of an eye. One moment, he’s gasping for air, a gaping hole in his chest, cradled in Klaus’ arms and trying to tell him that  _ it’s alright, you’re going to be alright, _ and the next, he’s coming-to in a dimly lit bedroom in 2019. 

After Klaus conjures him, though, time seems to even out once more. Time becomes linear again - at least, as linear as it can be in some pocket universe while Klaus and his siblings try to formulate a plan to stop  _ their _ world from ending - and before he knows it, a few weeks, then a few months, then an entire year has gone by, and he feels more whole than he has in decades, really. 

In fact, sometimes, it’s easy to forget that he’s  _ not _ alive. A year into his second chance at life (or the  _ afterlife, _ he should say) with Klaus, it’s easy to forget that he’s actually a ghost, made visible and corporeal by his superpowered boyfriend, especially when he begins to fall into a routine with Klaus, doing mundane things like cooking dinner, watching movies and even accompanying Klaus to Narcotics Anonymous meetings when he eventually decides that it might be a good idea to go, just to see what it’s all about. Sometimes, it’s hard to forget that he’s not alive when time starts to tick by at it’s normal pace again, when Klaus can make him corporeal more often than not.

So it’s a strange feeling when, one moment, Dave is lying in bed with Klaus, basking in the afterglow of sex and watching as the other man drifts off into a dreamless sleep and the next, he feels as if he’s being stretched thin, pulled away against his will, time warping and stretching and reversing around him.

* * *

 

_ It takes Dave a moment to register where he is and what’s going on. For a moment, everything is just white. Quiet. Still. _

_ Then, he blinks his eyes, and everything slowly comes into focus. First, it’s the sky, but that’s simply because he’s lying on his back. So when Dave sits up, eyes slowly adjusting to the bright light, he’s surprised at the sight before him.  _

_ Green grass and rolling hills stretch as far as the eye can see, backdropped by stunning, snow-capped mountain peaks, endless pine trees and blue skies. Dave stands as soon as he manages to get his bearings straight, only stumbling slightly once he’s upright. It’s an absolutely stunning sight, like something straight out of the movies, but why is he here? What’s happening? _

_ Then, he sees it, and he knows immediately.  _

_ There, situated neatly in the rolling green hills, just a few yards ahead, is a cozy looking little log cabin. Bathed in late afternoon sunlight, the cabin looks inviting and warm. It looks like home and immediately, Dave is drawn to it. _

_ Dave knows that he’s dreaming before anything really happens, but it’s odd… It’s odd, because as far as he understood, if the last year was any indicator, ghosts  _ don’t _ dream. He hasn’t dreamt once in the year that he has been back with Klaus, and although he can’t remember much, he’s certain that he never dreamt before then, either. After all, what would a ghost dream about? How would he even dream, if his consciousness always just… is? _

_ But he knows now, as he stands in the middle of the lush, green field, grass up to his shins, that he’s definitely dreaming. Nothing on earth could be this perfect, and surely, he’d remember getting here, right? _

_ Unless this is - _

_ No. _

_ He stops the thought before it even arrives. He isn’t going anywhere without Klaus. _

_ Right. Klaus. _

_ Suddenly, something inside the cabin calls to him, and Dave knows, without question, that he has to answer. He knows that Klaus must be there, waiting for him. It only makes sense.  _

_ So Dave’s legs carry him forward on their own volition, across the field and onto the small porch of the homey little log cabin. He doesn’t bother knocking, and as soon as he’s face to face with the door - time seems to jump forward, again - he reaches for the handle and pushes.  _

_ The scene inside the cabin is just as inviting and warm as the outside had been. Upon stepping inside, Dave is met with the sound of soft, dreamy music and a warmth that sinks into his bones and settles in his heart. He can’t help the smile that finds its way onto his face _

_ He takes a few steps forward, the door closing gently behind him, and takes in the interior of the cabin. Rustic but somehow very modern, the inside of the home is furnished with hand-carved furniture, earthy tones and warm string lights that criss-cross the ceiling and one of the far walls, giving the entire room an otherworldly glow.  _

_ Fingers dancing across the back of a well-worn, comfortable looking sofa, Dave ventures further into the cabin, eyes searching the room for another sign of life. For Klaus. He doesn’t find anything immediately, but he  _ does _find evidence of another person nearby when he eventually steps into the kitchen. On the counter sits an old radio - the source of the music that floats easily throughout the cabin - and nearby, a covered pot sits on the stove, the heat turned down low, simmering. Whatever it is, it smells heavenly._

_ It isn’t until he eventually wanders out of the kitchen that Dave finally spies the first photo, displayed on the wall in a beautiful, hand-carved frame. It’s a photo that Dave knows well, because he kept it in his wallet for years, even after his mother passed, even after he stopped talking to his father. It’s faded, just as Dave remembers it, but the black and white photo depicts a twelve year old Dave standing alongside his older brother and younger sister, and behind them, smiling happily, are their proud parents. _

_ Simpler times, Dave thinks fondly, reaching up to touch the frame _

_ Then, Dave’s eyes find the next photo. This one looks much more modern, in full color, although the tones are a bit muted. In the photo stand six young children, they can’t be more than ten or eleven years old, all wearing the same outfit - navy blazers with red trim, navy shorts, long black socks and of course, black and white masks that cover their eyes. Dave immediately recognizes the photo, because he’s seen it countless times in the hallway of Klaus’ childhood home.  _

_ Klaus.  _

_ Wait. Does that mean…? _

_ “Klaus?” Dave calls out then, unable to stop himself. He can’t help the hope that bubbles up in his chest, because if Klaus is here, then he needs to find him, needs to touch and hold him. And most importantly, he needs to ask him what’s going on.  _

_ The reply is immediate.  _

_ “Just a moment!” Klaus’ voice rings out throughout the cabin, bright and light. Warm and carefree. Dave turns immediately, his attention focused on the flight of stairs to his left, and without second thought, he begins to ascend them in search of Klaus.  _

_ Dave follows the sound of Klaus’ voice up into the second floor of the small cabin and eventually finds himself in a beautifully lit loft. White, cooler tones replace otherwise warm and earthy ones from the first floor, natural light filling the room through massive windows that overlook a stunning mountain view. All of it is enough to make the loft feel impossibly more ethereal than the first floor.  _

_There’s only one room that Dave hasn’t searched yet - a bedroom just a few steps ahead - but before he even has the chance to make his way in there, Klaus is stepping through the doorway, an absolute picture of perfection. Klaus pauses as soon as he sees Dave, giving Dave a chance to really take him - all of him - in, from his signature lace-up leather pants to the loose-fitting, deep v-neck and lacy, dark red cardigan, all the way to the dog tags that jingle around his neck, moving ever so slightly even though he is standing still. Dark eyeliner rims his green eyes, the way he ever-so-carefully applied it contrasting wonderfully with the way that his hair sticks up in all directions, as if he only ran his fingers through it after hopping out of bed._

_ Klaus’ face breaks out into a wide grin then, and without prompting, he does a little spin, the flowy cardigan billowing around his body as he moves. Dave can’t take his eyes off of him. He looks just as beautiful and mysterious and intriguing as the day they met.  _

_ “What do you think?” Klaus asks, a smile in his voice when he finally turns to face Dave again, and Dave swears, if his heart were beating, it would have stopped.  _

_ “You look… absolutely stunning,” Dave says at last, unable to mask his adoration for Klaus. Dream or not, he can’t help himself. He’s so helplessly in love with the other man, and it hits him like a truck each and every time he looks at him.  _

_ “You think?” Klaus asks, biting his lip as he gazes up at Dave, intent clear in his eyes.  _

_ “I know,” Dave replies. Then he reaches his arms out, frozen on the spot, as if Klaus will disappear if he moves. “Come here.” _

_ Klaus doesn’t have to be told twice, thankfully. Within just a few strides, he’s crossing the room, arms winding around Dave’s shoulders with ease once he’s close enough, while Dave’s own arms find their place around his waist. When their lips meet, it feels like coming home. It feels like everything just clicks into place, just like the first time they kissed, and the second, and third, and every single time following.  _

_ When the kiss eventually ends, as they all unfortunately do, it’s with Klaus’ hands in his hair, his own hands holding onto Klaus’ waist for dear life. Klaus keeps his gentle grip on the back of Dave’s neck, leaning forward to press their foreheads together in a brief, vulnerable display of affection. _

_ And god, it feels real, it really does, but Dave knows that it’s not, as much as he wishes it was. He wants nothing more than to make a life with Klaus like this, get a little A-frame cabin in the middle of the mountains and never have to worry about war or The Umbrella Academy or the end of the world ever again, but he can’t. He’ll never be able to build that life with Klaus, and that absolutely breaks his heart. He’ll never be able to have that, because he’s dead, and Klaus is not.  _

_ And just like that, Dave’s perfect little piece of heaven starts to come crumbling down around him. The warmth seems to dissipate as he takes a deep breath, exhaling it on a sigh.  _

_ “I’m dreaming,” Dave says at last, as if it’ll wake him up. As much as he loves this perfect little world, it’s a pipe-dream. He’d rather have his Klaus - the real deal - back home at the Academy, very much alive and lying in bed next to him. _

_ But dream Klaus just smiles, and it’s this sad, beautiful thing.  _

_ And he murmurs, voice soft, “If this is a dream, then I don’t want to wake up.” _

_ But, that’s exactly what Dave does.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, I definitely didn't mean to make this chapter as bittersweet as it is, but I SWEAR the rest will make up for it. The next chapter will have much more plot and explanation, but this just kind of happened and I needed to share it. 
> 
> Mostly, I felt like we needed a little bit of redemption for Klaus' stint in the afterlife, because it should have been Dave waiting for him and not Reggie. Ugh. So this is my version of Dave's brief stay in the afterlife, or it's a dream, whatever you want it to be. 
> 
> Again, thank you ALL for all the lovely comments and kudos. You give me life.


	3. Nothing Is Secret, Everything's Sacred

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALRIGHT.
> 
> Without giving too much away, I was super excited about writing this chapter because it has a ton of Dave and Five bonding. I really like writing these two together for some reason, and it gave me an excuse to give a little more info on Dave's family/backstory. 
> 
> _Wasn't it love as soon as we knew each other properly?_  
>  _Living 'bout half right, until a certain person got to me_  
>  _Nothing is secret, everything's sacred_  
>  _How it ought to be_  
>  _Under the moonlight_  
>  _On a clear night_  
>  _On rooftops is where I want to be_  
>  \- "For Island Fires And Family" - Dermot Kennedy

When Dave wakes, it’s with a sharp gasp. 

The first sensation that he registers is the burning, searing pain emanating from the center of his chest, as if someone is standing on him, strangling him, as if someone just stabbed straight through his sternum and twisted the knife roughly, to cause the most amount of pain.

It feels as if there’s a gaping hole in his chest, and Dave realizes, as he gasps for air, that he’s felt this way before. It feels like just yesterday. It feels like a hundred years ago. It feels like only moments ago, that he was bleeding out on the battlefield, cradled in Klaus’ arms, trying and failing to tell him, with his one final, gasping breath, how much he loved him.

Dave lurches up then, hands frantically reaching for something,  _ anything _ to hold onto, eyes searching for a familiar sight, something to ground him, to bring him back to reality. 

Something snaps inside of Dave, and suddenly, all of the memories come flooding back at once. 

_ Klaus, looking up at him with wide, curious and somewhat terrified eyes for the very first time inside that tent. Klaus, pressing a tentative kiss to his lips in the back of the disco, and for all of his confidence he seems rather hesitant until Dave kisses him back. Klaus, gasping his name and murmuring words of encouragement in his ear when Dave undressed him, when he touched him and when he made love to him for the first time.  _

_ The way that Klaus had absolutely broken down when they were able to hold each other again for the first time in what felt like forever. The excitement in Klaus’ emerald eyes when he was able to make Dave corporeal for the first, second, third, forth, and fifth time. And every time after, because it never gets old.  _

_ And of course, the way that Klaus never ceases to surprise and amaze him with his capacity for love and forgiveness and growth, even after enduring so much pain.  _

Sure, there was more to Dave’s life than Klaus, but the other man has been his center for so long, that it only makes sense that he’s the first person that Dave thinks of, the first person he searches for when he comes-to, confused and cold and in pain.

And  _ fuck, _ the pain is nearly unbearable. As fast as he sits up, Dave’s falling back again, teeth clenching, a groan ripping through his throat. 

He doesn’t register the hand on his arm at first, his senses dulled from the searing pain in his chest, but Dave  _ does _ feel the slight prick of a needle in his arm a few seconds later, and when he glances up, it’s to find not Klaus, as he had hoped, but none other than Klaus’ mother,  _ Grace _ at his side, and just a few inches to her right, Number Five. Almost immediately after the slight pin-prick of pain in his arm, relief floods through Dave’s veins. The sensation is almost instantaneous and it makes his head spin how fast it happens

The only thing that makes it spin more is the concept of what exactly is going on here. The last he remembered, he’d been lying in bed next to Klaus, watching as the other man slowly drifted off into sleep, still replaying the events from earlier in the day in his head, and now, he’s lying on some, what is it? A makeshift hospital bed? A gurney? He knows he’s still in the Academy, judging by Grace and Five’s presence and the decor around him, but he surprisingly doesn’t recognize the room. It almost reminds him of a hospital.

And even more strange is the fact that Grace is  _ touching  _ him right now, fingers prodding his arm gently as she tapes down the IV, and  _ okay… _ Dave knew that Klaus’ powers were stronger now more than ever, but he didn’t think the other man was strong enough to keep him corporeal while he was sleeping. And that doesn’t explain the IV, the hospital bed, nor the concerned look in Five’s eyes. 

Distantly, Dave registers that Grace is speaking, something about  _ resting and not moving too much, you’re still recovering _ but the words sound far away, and by the time he shakes himself out of it enough to focus, Grace simply smiles down at him, a gentle hand on his shoulder and says softly, “I’ll let you two boys talk.” 

As soon as Dave is able to focus, the burning pain in his chest all but a distant memory, he tries to wrap his head around what’s going on. Grace’s heels sound loud in his ears as they click across the tile floor and the when the door shuts behind her, it’s with a loud sense of finality that leaves the room eerily quiet.

And then there’s Five, who still stands to Dave’s right, just a few feet from the bed, eyes wide, mouth open, as if he’s unsure of what to say

“Five?” Dave asks at last, and he winces at the sound of his voice, rough with disuse. 

_ What is happening? What happened? _

There are a dozen questions that Dave wants to ask, but he doesn’t even know where to begin, so he simply just  _ looks _ at Klaus’ brother and hopes that it does the trick. 

“Well, you can remember me, so that’s a start,” Five mutters, taking a few steps forward, closer to the side of Dave’s bed.

“What -” Dave coughs, his throat feeling impossibly dry. “What’s that supposed to mean? Of course I remember you.” Then when Five doesn’t say anything else right away, Dave asks, “What’s going on?” 

Instead of answering his question, though, Five simply asks in return, “What’s the last thing that you remember?”

Dave furrows his brows, trying to figure out exactly what Five is getting at, but when he receives no form of explanation, he sighs, closing his eyes

He wants to say  _ dying, gasping for air in Klaus’ arms and wishing I could tell him that I love him one last time, _ but no, he knows that’s not true. No, instead, he answers, “Watching movies with Klaus last night, then going to bed.”

“Is that all?” Five presses, as if he doesn’t quite believe him

“Yes,” Dave answers confidently, but he quickly adds, “I mean, unless you want to hear about the more intimate details of last night…” When Five simply cringes in response, Dave just mutters, “I had a strange dream about a cabin… But yeah, that’s the last thing I remember. Why?"

Five sighs, then, nodding, as if steeling himself. “I suppose I have some explaining to do,” he says finally.

The way he says it  _ should _ worry Dave, and it does, at least a little bit, but considering everything he’s been through so far, Five would have to try pretty hard to surprise or scare him. Ever since Klaus entered his life, nothing has been normal, and while it has been a learning curve, he wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Then explain,” Dave says with a shrug. He attempts to sit up again, but his arms nearly buckle under the strain, the ache in his chest returning slightly. He gasps at the spike of pain, and then suddenly, Five’s hands are there, helping him to sit up. 

“Don’t exert yourself too much, you’re still healing,” Five insists before he can stop the words from leaving his mouth, and Dave can tell immediately that he didn’t mean to say it by the way he freezes, hands hovering just over Dave’s body. 

_ “Healing?”  _ Dave presses, trying to wrap his mind around what Five just said. What does he mean  _ healing? _ He wasn’t lying - the last thing he remembered was lying in bed next to Klaus. What happened between then and now? “What - what happened? Where am I?”

Five swallows, taking a step back, and Dave can practically see when he morphs back into the adult that he  _ knows _ he is, face hard, features schooled. “You’re in the infirmary,” Five explains matter-of-factly. “You’ve been out for a couple of days.”

“I’ve been out…?” Dave questions, “Five, what is that supposed to mean? I didn’t think that ghosts - that I -”

“Let’s wait until you wake up a little bit, then I’ll explain,” Five says suddenly, cutting Dave off in a stern, clipped tone.

But Dave doesn’t settle for that. He takes a chance, reaching out to grab Five’s wrist before he walks away and is relieved when his hand doesn’t pass through him.  _ Okay then, still corporeal. Great.  _

“Explain.  _ Now,”  _ Dave insists, voice hard. 

Five swallows, but he nods then, finally caving. “Fine,” he mutters, “But I don’t - you might not like it.”

_ “I don’t like _ being kept in the dark,” Dave counters, “So tell me what’s going on. Please.”

Five sighs. “Alright. Fine. Just -” he turns then, reaching behind him to grab a chair, dragging it across tile floor to take a seat at Dave’s bedside, and just that action alone tells Dave that it’s going to be a long story, so he settles in for the ride. 

“Do you remember, the other night - well, I guess  _ last night,  _ for you - that talk we had?” Five asks as a way of starting the conversation, and Dave’s not quite sure that he follows, but he nods. 

“Yeah, what about it?” he asks, choosing to ignore Five's  _last night, for you_ comment. 

“Well I -” Five sighs, glancing down at his hands. “I had initially planned on asking you something, for you permission to  _ do _ something, but I didn’t. I mean, I guess I did, in some roundabout way, but -”

“You’re not making any sense,” Dave interrupts.

“Yeah, well, nothing here makes any sense, you should be used to that by now,” Five snaps in response. He’s quick to shake his head, though, muttering out an apology. “Sorry, it’s just - this is hard to explain.”

“Can’t be much harder than telling me that your family is full of superheroes, you can conjure the dead, and we only met because you accidentally traveled back in time using some magical briefcase,” Dave mutters in response, which earns a chuckle from Five.

“Touché,” he admits, “I should give you more credit for dealing with our weird-ass shit.”

Dave offers Five a smile, but is quick to get back down to business. “Anyway…”

“Right,” Five says, a little more confidently this time,  _ “Anyway, _ I had initially come to you to ask for you permission to try something, but I ended up not saying anything, because I didn’t want to get your -  _ or Klaus’ _ \- hopes up for nothing. So instead, I just… gave it a shot.”

“Five…”

“It was stupid and reckless and I  _ should have asked _ but -”

_ “Five,” _ Dave interrupts gently, despite the way that Five’s words worry him. “What did you do?”

Five sighs. “I went back,” he explains, voice quiet, and for the first time, Dave actually  _ does _ feel like he’s speaking to a thirteen year old boy, not a man who has over twenty years on him. He sounds small, scared and embarrassed, but Dave can’t focus on the  _ way _ he speaks for too long, when he hears the words that are coming out of his mouth.

“I went back to the day that you died,” he continues, “And I brought you back.”

“Wait, you  _ brought me back?” _ Dave repeats, “Five, what are you trying to say? I’m not sure I understand…”

“Well, we really wouldn’t have a reason to keep a  _ ghost _ hooked up to an IV  _ or  _ on morphine, would we?” Five simply asks by way of explanation.

Deep down, Dave  _ knows _ what he means. He’s not stupid, he knows what Five is getting at, and in some way, he knew from the moment that he felt the pain in his chest and Grace’s hand on his arm, but he didn’t want to entertain the thought because  _ surely _ that couldn’t be right. He couldn’t be… 

_ “What did you do?”  _ Dave repeats again, unable to say the words, unable to finish his thought because he  _ doesn’t  _ want to get his hopes up. He doesn’t want to be let down. So he asks the question again, in hopes that Five will say it for him. 

Instead, Five asks, “Did Klaus ever tell you what happened to Luther? How he… became the way he is?”

Dave nods, unable to speak, his mind struggling to keep up with Five’s train of thought. 

“Well, ever since we came back, I’ve been working on Reginald’s formula… trying to find a way to reverse the…  _ physical _ side effects of the serum on Luther,” Five explains, “You know, trying to be a good brother and all…”

Suddenly, it all seems to click, but Dave doesn’t say anything. He  _ can’t  _ say anything, because he wants Five to confirm it. 

“While I was working on the serum, I had this  _ idea,”  _ Five continues. “I knew how badly Klaus wanted to go back and stop your death, but we couldn’t. It would alter the timeline too much. I wish it wouldn’t, but -”

Five cuts himself off, shaking his head.  _ “Anyway,  _ I knew we couldn’t go back and stop your death, but what if we could just  _ reverse _ it? You know… do what Reginald did to Luther, just without the shitty side effects.”

“You used the serum on me,” Dave says, his voice barely above a whisper. He knew what Five was going to say before he said it, but it’s strange, hearing it confirmed. 

“Not without testing it countless times, of course,” Five insists, “I might be reckless, but I’m not an idiot. When I was certain I had the formula right, I went back and well…” he stretches his arms out, gesturing around him in a way that reminds Dave a lot of Klaus. They  _ are _ brothers, after all.  _ “Here we are.” _

Dave swallows, and suddenly, everything around him feels too real. Too heavy. He’s not sure how he didn’t notice it before -  the achey, tired feeling in his limbs, the headache that feels like someone stuffed cotton up his nose, the rapid pounding of his racing heart… he hasn’t felt this way since -

Well, since before he died. 

“So you mean I’m -”

“Alive?” Five supplies at last, glancing up at Dave, offering him a smile. “All signs point to yes.”

And then, it feels like a massive weight has been lifted from Dave’s chest, even as a thousand questions bubble up in his throat. It happens so fast, it makes his head spin as he struggles to understand what this means, what just happened. 

Over the past year, he has come to terms with the fact that he is dead. That, although he and Klaus have something  _ beautiful _ right now, there’s a lot that they  _ can’t _ have, too. While Klaus’ powers have been able to give them a lot, they won’t allow them to grow old together, won’t allow them to build a life together. Although he never voiced it to Klaus - assuring himself that it was a conversation for another time - they were thoughts that plagued him late at night, that haunted him whenever he and Klaus would share an intimate, precious moment together, because while it all seemed perfect now, he was certain that it wouldn’t last forever.

But now…

Now, Dave can’t help the hope that rises in his chest because  _ maybe, _ he’ll be able to have that. 

_ “Shit,” _ he mutters at last, as the weight of Five’s words and actions finally hit him. It all feels too good to be true, so he has to ask, “But I - I mean… this doesn’t make sense. If you  _ brought me back,  _ then why can I remember everything?”

Five cocks his head to the side. “What do you mean?”

“Dying,” Dave explains, “Klaus conjuring me… helping him train, saving the world… I remember it all from when - well, when I was dead.”

“Well that’s… unexpected,” Five says at last, leaning back in his chair slightly as he regards Dave, “But good.  _ Shit, _ that’s  _ really _ good.”

“How so?” Dave asks, struggling to keep up. 

“I’ve done all the math, and I figured that  _ stopping  _ your death would change the timeline too much, but if I could bring you back  _ after _ you died, then it should work,” Five explains again, going into a little more detail this time, “We’d unfortunately need Klaus heartbroken enough to get sober, to try to conjure you... I figured there was a fifty percent chance that the outcome of the past year would be the same, and it seems that it was.”

“And you didn’t think to  _ talk _ to us about this?” Dave asks then. He’s not angry, just…  _ confused.  _ And frustrated. Okay, and maybe a little angry. He mostly feels like his mind is playing catch-up, still stuck on the fact that he’s actually  _ alive.  _

“Like I said, I  _ tried,” _ Five mutters, exasperated, “I promise you, I did, I just… I didn’t know where to start, how to explain -

“You haven’t told him yet, have you?” Dave asks then, interrupting Five mid-sentence. There’s no way that Five has told Klaus yet, otherwise the other man would already be here by his side, Dave knows it. 

Five simply looks up at him in response, face hard. Just the look alone tells Dave all he needs to know. 

_ “Jesus,  _ Five -”

_ “I’m sorry,”  _ Five mutters, cutting him off, “I wanted to tell him, but… I can’t. Not until I run a few tests. I just need to make sure I’m not fucking this up.”

Dave sighs. There’s so much that he wants to say, like  _ maybe _ Five shouldn’t have done anything until he knew for sure that he wasn’t fucking it up, because he was messing with people’s  _ lives _ here, but he doesn’t say that. Not yet, at least. 

“Five, you can’t - you  _ need _ to tell Klaus,” he argues. If Five is right, if it  _ has _ been a couple of days, then that means that Klaus likely hasn’t been able to conjure him for a while, and they haven’t been apart for more than a few hours since they were reunited. He can only imagine the frear, frustration and confusion that Klaus is going through right now. “He’s going to wonder why I’m not there. He deserves to know, even if this isn’t successful.”

Five swallows. “I can’t - I can’t do that to him.”

“How do you know if you haven’t talked to him?” Dave argues gently, “Look, I get that you  _ tried, _ but one conversation without explicitly asking my permission doesn’t cut it.”

“I get that you’re upset,” Five counters, “And I’m sorry. I know, I should have asked for your permission, but I  _ couldn’t.” _

And  _ god,  _ Dave wants to be mad at Five. Deep down, he is, even if just a little bit, because while it  _ was _ such a selfless act, bringing him back when he didn’t need to, trying to do something for his brother, it could have ruined so much. If Five has been telling the truth, then he  _ knew _ that he had a chance of completely altering the past year of not just his, but  _ Klaus’ _ life as well. Hell, and that may have even altered their timeline altogether. From what Five has told him, he was aware that there was a chance that bringing him back to life would have stolen the past year in the pocket universe from him and Klaus… all of those memories, all of that growth, those intimate, sacred moments shared with Klaus that he’d never get back.

Thankfully, that  _ didn’t _ happen, and it doesn’t seem that it’s going to, but the fact of the matter is, there was a  _ chance _ that Five could have stolen the past year from them - hell, he could have stolen their future from them as well - and he didn’t ask them what they thought of the plan first. When Five had come to him and asked if he would have followed Klaus back home, knowing what he knows now, he had said yes, of course, no questions asked… but that was without knowing the full extent of Five’s question. That was without knowing the big picture and the risks involved. 

If he had known then what he knows now… well, he’s not so sure what he’d say. 

But, that doesn’t change the fact that he’s here now. That regardless, Five went ahead with the plan without talking to them about it first. So Dave sighs, defeated and exhausted. And  _ fuck, _ he forgot what it felt like to feel tired. 

“Yeah, I get it,” Dave mutters at last. He tips his head back, closing his eyes, and focuses on taking deep breaths. In, then out. He focuses on the way that the air fills his lungs, the movement in his chest because he’s  _ alive, _ and suddenly, everything else feels trivial. His body deflates, and he sighs. 

“I suppose I should say thank you,” he murmurs then, turning to glance at Five. “We shouldn’t be arguing right now. This is… this is  _ incredible,  _ Five.”

Number Five simply smiles in response, understanding evident in his eyes. “I know you want to see Klaus, but I need to run some tests first… make sure I’m not giving you false hope,” he explains at last. “Just… give me a few days. I mean, worst case scenario, you die again and we’re right back to where we started, but -”

“It’s fine,” Dave insists, cutting Five’s thoughts short, “I understand. Do whatever you need to.”

“Thank you,” Five sighs at last. “I promise, I’ll try to hurry.”

* * *

 

Five  _ does _ try to hurry, but with Dave still recovering - albeit rather  _ quickly  _ \- and with countless tests to run and only Grace helping him, it takes  _ time,  _ as does everything. For another two days, Dave remains holed up in the infirmary, unable to get up except to use the restroom with Grace’s assistance and unable to leave until Five gives him the all-clear. 

More than once, Dave contemplates getting up and leaving on the rare occasions that he is left alone. Five and all of his tests be damned, Dave wants nothing more than to go find Klaus, to let him know that he’s okay, that he’s still here…  _ that he’s alive. _ But he ultimately decides against it, partially because he knows that Five is right, he  _ should _ let him finish running tests before giving Klaus (or himself) any false hope, but mostly just because he knows it’ll be a challenge to make it up the flights of stairs that lead to Klaus’ bedroom, and the last thing he wants is to die on his way up. What a shitty way to go.

So Dave complies, letting Five draw blood and take urine samples multiple times a day. He wants to question it - because how in the  _ world _ could Five honestly know enough to determine if the effects of the serum are permanent and if there are any adverse side-effects - but then he remembers that he has Grace, and she probably knows a whole hell of a lot more about it than any of them. 

Dave has spent quite a bit of time with Five over the past year while working on Klaus’ training, so thankfully, the whole situation isn’t as awkward or painful as it  _ should _ be. In fact, other than Ben, Number Five is probably the Hargreeves sibling that he has grown the closest to. Over the past year, Dave has learned that, while has probably been through more shit than most of his siblings combined (Ben and Klaus excluded, mostly) he also has the most amount of light and hope hidden inside of him. He doesn’t let it show often, buried underneath snide remarks and a fortress of steel, but Dave sees right through him, because he soldiered alongside men like him not long ago. He saw it in his father, after he returned from the war, and he even saw it in Klaus from time to time. 

Deep down, Five cares, and even if Dave didn’t already know that, he gets to know the extent of which he cares a bit more intimately over the course of the next few days. 

It’s the morning of the second day, as Grace is drawing his blood, when Dave decides to make small talk, not really expecting much out of it, but needing to talk about  _ something _ to get his mind off of the blood filling the vile. It makes him squeamish to watch, which is comical, considering he fought in a fucking  _ war. _

“So,” he says, glancing up at Five, “What made you want to start experimenting with the serum to begin with?”

Five glances up at him from where he’s standing at the foot of the bed, scribbling notes in a notebook, and  _ god, _ it’s at moments like this that he really does look his age. 

Dave expects a short, clipped answer from Five, so he’s genuinely surprised when he earns a long, hard look in response, followed by Five’s explanation. “Reginald fucked us all up,” he mutters at last, “But at least most of us scraped by without any physical reminders of it. You know… minus the tattoos. And Ben, of course.”

“And Diego’s scar,” Five adds as an afterthought. Immediately, Dave knows that Five is talking about the long stretch of scar tissue that runs along Diego’s temple, and he understands the implication of Five’s words - that their father gave him that scar, that he was the reason that Ben died. Dave always suspected as much, but the thought alone is enough to make him want to be sick. 

_ “Anyway,” _ Five says, shaking him from his thoughts, “Luther, he… he has to look in the mirror everyday, reminded of  _ exactly _ what Reginald did to us.” 

Dave takes note of the fact that Five  _ always  _ refers to him by his first name, never by  _ dad _ or even  _ father. _ He doesn’t blame him. 

“You wanted to fix him,” Dave infers.

“Yeah,” Five sighs. “I mean… I  _ know _ that nothing can fix the emotional shit that he put us through, and nothing can reverse four years of seclusion for nothing, but if I could just do  _ that _ for him…”

Five trails off, but Dave understands what he means. He also immediately understands where Five’s need to help his siblings stems from. He’s doing it with Luther, and now Klaus, as if he’s trying to make up for lost time. 

“You know,” Dave says, “You don’t need to make up for the time that you weren’t here. I don’t know about the others, but I know for a fact that Klaus doesn’t blame you, for being gone for so long. All that matters is that you’re here now.” 

He’s completely aware of the fact that he’s probably overstepping some sort of boundary here, but at this point, he doesn’t care. Five overstepped a boundary when he went back in time and brought him back to life without asking. They’re kind of even now, he supposes. 

Five doesn’t say anything for a moment. Instead, he just watches Dave with wide eyes, as if he just grew a second head, and when he doesn’t say anything right away, Dave assumes that he’s not going to say anything at all.

But then, he does. 

“Seventeen years,” Five sighs, and he just sounds so…  _ tired.  _ “I was gone for  _ seventeen years.” _

Dave doesn’t say anything right away, certain that Five has more to say and unwilling to rush him through it. He knows that this is probably his first time talking about it, and Dave knows that he deserves patience.

“I missed  _ so much,” _ Five mutters. His voice is unsteady, and Dave realizes that this is the first time he’s  _ really _ seen him show emotion like this, so openly. “I mean, we were all pretty fucked up even before I left, but I’ve always wondered if things would have been different if I hadn’t disappeared. Maybe, we would have stuck together. We wouldn’t be so fucking dysfunctional, you know. Hell, Ben  _ died  _ and I wasn’t even there.”

“That’s not your fault,” Dave argues gently. Next to him, Grace is hard at work, and he wonders what  _ she _ thinks of this conversation, if she thinks  _ anything.  _

“You were just a kid,” Dave continues, “You were  _ all _ just kids. You had no way of knowing.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not a kid anymore,” Five mutters, “And I’d like to make up for lost time.”

Dave hums in understanding. He can’t change Five’s mind, and he didn’t expect to, but he just wishes that he could see how much his siblings care for him… how grateful they are that he’s back.

“You can’t be a perfect brother,” Dave insists at last, “All you can do is try to be better.”

“Yeah,” Five sighs, his head dropping slightly as he gazes down at his hands, apparently deep in thought. The conversation got a lot deeper than Dave had anticipated, but it felt good. It felt like maybe, they were getting somewhere. 

“You said you had siblings,” Five says, voice soft after a beat of silence. It’s an effort to change the subject, but Dave welcomes it. “What were they like?”

It’s odd, hearing someone talk about his siblings in the past tense, because  _ yeah,  _ Dave assumes they’re either much older than him now, or they’ve passed away. Hell, if this all works out, maybe he could try to find them, just to see how they’re doing…

But Dave doesn’t say that right now. Instead, he offers Five a smile. “Yeah,” he replies, “My older brother, Adam - he’s three years older than me. He was planned, I was… well, an  _ accident, _ right before my father went off to war.”

Five nods, moving around the bed to take a seat at Dave’s side, and Dave genuinely appreciates the distraction while Grace begins drawing another vile of blood. 

“He was kind of the pride and joy of our family,” Dave explains. “Quarterback of the football team, married his high school sweetheart at nineteen, two kids by the time he was twenty-three… White picket fence and everything. He’s - he  _ was _ a good man, but we never really saw eye to eye. I’m sure you understand that.” 

“But he was the first person I told, when I thought I might - when I realized I was attracted to men,” Dave continues. “He didn’t tell our parents, and I know he kind of always looked at me differently after that, but he didn’t stop talking to me, so that was  _ something.” _

“Called me stupid for joining the army, though,” he says with a chuckle, “But we loved each other. You know know how siblings are.”

Five smiles. “I do.”

“And my sister, Elizabeth,” Dave smiles at the sound of her name. He’s talked to Klaus about her - about  _ both _ of his siblings - back in Vietnam, insisting that he’d have to introduce him when they got home. Now, here he is talking to  _ Klaus’ _ brother about them. Weird, how things work out. 

“Lizzy,” Dave continues, “She  _ hated _ when I called her that. She was the baby - four years younger than me… wanted to be an art teacher when she was little. She had  _ just _ landed her first job at the local elementary school, right before I was deployed. Wrote me a letter every week.” 

The thought is bittersweet, now. Dave can’t help but wonder how many of Lizzy’s letters went unopened, undelivered before she received the news of his death. He wonders how she took it, and hopes that she was able to move on. 

“You were close with her,” Five infers.

“Yeah,” Dave murmurs, “As close as I could be. She didn’t - with Adam seven years older than her, they didn’t really click as well as we did.  _ I _ was her big brother. She looked up to me.” 

Dave’s quiet for a moment then adds, “I wish I could see her again.”

There’s a regretful tone to Five’s voice when he mutters, “Dave you know -”

“I know I can’t,” Dave interrupts before Five can get the words out. He glances up then, sharing a long look with Five. “Like I told you. I’d come here in a heartbeat. That hasn’t changed.”

Dave’s conversation with Five  _ does _ get him thinking about his family later that night, when he’s left alone with his thoughts, though. He can’t help but wonder what their lives were like without him, can’t help but hope that they were able to move on easily after they received the news that he was killed in combat or, more than likely, mission in action, since Five had taken his body. He wonders if Elizabeth finally got to teach high school art class, as she had always hoped to, and what Adam’s kids are like now, all grown up and leading their own lives. If his siblings are still alive, they’d be in their 70’s and 80’s by now, and he can’t help but wonder if they’ve lived long, successful lives, something that he never thought he’d be able to do, but now, might have a shot at.

And he thinks of his dad. They stopped speaking about two years before he was deployed, shortly after Dave  _ finally _ came out to him, and only talked once or twice before he left for Vietnam - enough to say a proper goodbye. Although, if Dave knew that he’d end up where he is now, maybe he would have said just a little bit more to his father. Maybe he would have tried to make amends, before the end, because he knows he’ll never get the chance to, now. 

Truthfully, Dave’s father played a huge part in shaping him into the man he is today. He taught Dave about compassion, patience, and acceptance. Although he didn’t always practice when he preached, as Dave discovered later in life, those were the values that he took with him into adulthood. That, and honesty. Bravery. A desire to help others. That’s what landed him in the military after all. And well, if it weren’t for that, then he never would have met Klaus. So actually, he has his father to thank for that, too. 

Maybe, Dave thinks, lying in the dark, alone with his thoughts, Klaus would be able to find his father some day, so they could finally have a long overdue talk. Dave would never ask that of Klaus if he didn’t feel comfortable doing it, of course, but if the opportunity presented itself, he’d absolutely take it.

* * *

 

The morning of Dave’s third day in the infirmary and fifth day in the land of the living, Five is already there when he wakes up, assisting Grace as she checks his vitals. 

“How are you feeling?” Five asks as soon as Dave is awake enough to form complete sentences, munching on some breakfast that Grace brings him a little later. 

“Good,” Dave replies honestly. He takes a deep breath, as if to prove it, then says, “Like I can breathe a little easier.”

“Good,” Five echoes. “Maybe we can get you up and walking around a little bit today. I’m sure you’re dying to stretch your legs.”

Dave’s eyes light up at Five’s words, but just as fast as the hope is there, it’s squashed. 

“It’s uh - it’s going to be a little hard, to get you around the house without Klaus or Diego noticing, but they’re both out until later this afternoon,” Five explains as soon as he sees the look cross Dave’s face. “Do you want a shower or a bath? I can find you a change of clothes… I’m sure Luther won’t notice if anything goes missing.”

It’s not what Dave had been hoping for, but a bath  _ does _ sound good, and he reasons that the sooner he’s up and walking around, the sooner that he’ll be able to see Klaus. So he agrees, and about thirty minutes later, Dave is holding onto Grace’s arm as he makes his way up one flight of stairs, then another to the bathroom. 

The Academy is quiet as they make their ascent, and Five quickly gathers a change of clothes from Luther’s bedroom before leading Dave into the restroom, leaving the sweatpants and t-shirt sitting on the sink. “I’ll leave you to it,” he mutters as he steps out the door, “But yell if you need me.” 

Dave’s joints are stiff as he undresses, so he takes his time stepping out of his pants before pulling the white t-shirt up and over his head. Five had already given him one clean change of clothes after he had woken that first day in the infirmary, but it’ll be nice to have something a little more comfortable and a little less  _ lived in. _

The routine of undressing is so mundane, something that Dave never thinks about, that he doesn’t even stop until he spies his reflection in the bathroom mirror. And  _ oh. _

Dave steps forward, his gaze narrowing on the center of his chest. There, just above his sternum, pink and slightly irritated is an ugly, healing scar. It’s about the size of his fist, he notices, as he reaches up to touch the angry skin with trembling fingers, but the strangest thing about it is the fact that the scar is… well, a  _ scar.  _ Considering the fact that Dave was just _ shot _ less than a week ago, he was expecting to find an open wound, an ugly scab,  _ something. _ Not the old remnants of an injury that it looks like he acquired ages ago. 

_ That serum really is something else... _

Shrugging, Dave finally steps away from the mirror and into the bath, where the warm water is still running. As soon as he lowers himself into the tub, he feels the heat sink into his bones, helping him relax in a way that he hasn’t been able to in ages, and he lets out a trembling sigh, his head falling back against the porcelain. And, for a blissful thirty minutes, Dave doesn’t think. He doesn’t worry. He just  _ is. _

Dave lets the water soothe him, soaking and cleaning himself until the hot water ends up going lukewarm, then eventually cold, before he finally steps out of the bath and towels himself off. And once he’s dressed once more, he feels more refreshed than he has in years. 

Luther’s clothes thankfully fit him like a glove - he assumes they’re something that he owned  _ before _ the accident - and once he’s finally dressed, Dave spares one more glance at himself in the mirror before stepping quietly out into the hallway. And then, instead of heading back downstairs like he  _ knows _ he should, Dave finds himself pausing before turning and padding down the hallway, towards Klaus’ bedroom. 

He  _ knows _ that Klaus isn’t home, that he isn’t going to find him  _ or _ Ben in there when he pushes the door open ever so slightly and steps through the entryway, but that doesn’t stop him from doing so. The bedroom is empty, as expected, but Dave finds himself standing there, studying it in a way that he never has before. 

Whenever Klaus is in the same room as him, he demands Dave’s full attention. It’s not a bad thing at all - it’s how things have always been between him and Klaus, he can never take his eyes off of him - so now, in his empty bedroom, Dave feels as if he can finally get to know him in a different way. Barefoot, Dave steps over dirty clothes and a few pillows as he studies the adolescent posters that still line Klaus’ walls, as well as the writing and drawings that accompany them. It’s something that Klaus has recently been thinking about covering up - something about having to look at his past self on a daily basis - but now, Dave is glad that he hasn’t yet. This bedroom feels like an extension of Klaus, like an open book, telling Dave everything he can’t already see about Klaus on the outside.

Running his fingers along Klaus’ bed frame, Dave walks slowly across his bedroom, taking it all in, realizing that this is  _ his _ life now, too, with a warm sense of joy. He wants to share this -  _ all of this  _ \- with Klaus. Weird shit, fucked up childhood, demons and all. He wants every part of him, and now, he can actually have it. 

And yeah, it isn’t some beautiful log cabin in the mountains or a little ranch home in Nevada or even a cramped apartment in California, but it  _ does _ feel like home. 

“Hey,” Five’s voice is soft from the doorway, but the sudden sound of it still causes Dave to jump slightly before he turns to face him. “I know this is probably the last thing you want to hear, but I still have some final tests to run, before you’re ready to see him.”

“You know he’s going to be ecstatic either way, right?” Dave asks, even as he takes a few steps in Five’s direction, complying. 

“Yeah, but I want this to be permanent,” Five insists, a desperate hint to his voice. “He deserves this.” 

“Yeah…” Dave agrees, taking one last glance around Klaus’ room before following Five back down the hallway. “He does.”

* * *

 

Later that night, Five gives him the all-clear. He doesn’t think that he heard him right the first time because honestly, it was starting to seem like he was  _ never _ going to get to see Klaus again, so when Five confirms it, he nearly jumps out of bed with excitement.

“Well, you passed with flying colors,” Five says later, standing in the doorway of the infirmary, his arms crossed, a smile on his face.

Dave had been reading when Five made his presence known, buried in Reginald’s copy of The Lord of the Rings that Five had dropped in his lap two days ago, muttering something along the lines of,  _ “He didn’t strike me as the fantasy type, but I found this hiding in his study. Klaus said you liked it, so…”  _

But now, Five has his full  attention.

“Really?” he asks, hope rising in his chest. He knows better than to get  _ too  _ excited, but maybe, this means he’ll finally be able to see Klaus. 

“Yeah,  _ really,” _ Five insists. “Everything came back clean. You’re here to stay, Dave Katz.”

_ “Shit,” _ Dave mutters then, sitting up fully and turning in the bed. “Does that mean - can I -”

Five laughs then, a full, hearty laugh and says, “Yeah. Go get him.”

Dave doesn’t have to be told twice. 

He’d run up the stairs if he could, but even with the serum, he’s still only five, going on six days since  _ dying, _ so he knows that he should take it easy. Even making the trek up the stairs earlier had been a bit of a challenge earlier, leaving him winded by the time he finally stepped into the bathroom, but this is more than worth the exertion

By the time Dave makes his way up the stairs and down the hallway to Klaus’ bedroom again, the entire house is dark, save for a little bit of light filtering out from underneath his closed door. It feels slightly reminiscent of the first time that Klaus was able to conjure him, late at night over a year ago now, only this time, Dave is here to stay. Only this time, Dave is alive. They have a chance at a  _real_ future together, something he never thought was possible. 

Heart racing, Dave finally approaches Klaus’ bedroom door, a million thoughts racing through his head, a million words that he wants to say, but he doesn’t even know where to begin. So instead he reaches up and he  _ knocks. _

It’s quiet for a moment, and, just like every time Klaus spared him a passing glance or a warm smile, every time he reached for his hand in the dark, lacing their fingers together, or every kiss that they’ve shared, time seems to stand still. Klaus has a way of doing that, and Dave wonders, as he stands outside of his bedroom, heartbeat loud in his own ears, if maybe that’s just another power that Klaus has. At least, it’s a power he certainly has over Dave. 

Then, softly from behind the door, there’s a voice calling out to him, a voice that Dave has been dying to hear for ages, even though it’s really only been five days, or fifty years, depending on how you look at it.

_ “Yeah, come in.” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MAN.
> 
> I was really not planning on writing like 7k words of Dave and Five bonding, but then this just came out. I really wanted to be able to explain what exactly Five did, how Dave was able to retain his memories and give a little backstory here, so I hope it translated well. 
> 
> If it isn't clear between the last chapter and this one, time is not necessarily linear for ghosts, which made it possible for Dave to have an entire year with Klaus in the few minutes that he was actually dead... if that makes sense. Idk, it made more sense in my head, so hopefully it translates well written, haha. Basically, I just couldn't bring myself to take that entire year and all of that character development away from Dave and Klaus. I'm not THAT evil. 
> 
> The next chapter will be strictly from Klaus' point of view, so BUCKLE UP. IT'S ABOUT TO GET INTENSE.


	4. When I'm Face to Face with Death I'll Grab His Throat and Ask Him, "How Does It Hurt?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO. Here’s a long-ass note since this is the very last chapter of this (accidentally massive) fic. 
> 
> When I originally started working on [It’s Not Living (If It’s Not With You)](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1295501), I initially planned for it to be this short little three-part fic chronicling Klaus’ life before, during and after Dave… and then all the sudden I had all of these ideas and then another plot entirely, and then I word vomited all of this. So THANK YOU to everyone who stuck with this when I wasn’t really quite sure where this was going and came along for the ride. 
> 
> This chapter in particular is a bit of an emotional roller coaster and does have a few heavy themes. So just… be warned. There ARE some brief mentions of suicide/suicidal thoughts and relapse in here.
> 
> (Also I should mention, this chapter picks up from Klaus' point of view at the end of the first chapter.)
> 
> I definitely only planned on this final chapter being about 7-8k words and then all the sudden it kind of just ran away with me, SO BUCKLE THE FUCK UP FOR OVER 15K WORDS OF KLAUS LOVING DAVE WITH ALL OF HIS HEART. 
> 
> _Know that feeling when you think your heart is gonna come right out through your shirt?_   
>  _I get it a couple times a year but I've been getting it more often with her_   
>  _When I'm face to face with death I'll grab his throat_   
>  _And ask him, "how does it hurt?"_
> 
> _In those golden moments growing old too quickly_   
>  _Was he thinking of her?_
> 
> _She's bringing the moon and the stars to me_  
>  _Damn permanent reverie_  
>  _And even though this life, this love is brief_  
>  _I've got some people who carry me_  
>  \- "For Island Fires and Family" - Dermot Kennedy

“Fuck, _Dave,”_ Klaus gasps, breathless and needy. His own voice sounds foreign to his ears, far away and detached, but thankfully, Klaus is anything but.

Every touch, every moment, every kiss and every thrust of Dave’s hips lights Klaus’ nerves on fire, has him gasping out for more. Klaus has a nasty habit of drifting, of floating away during sex, but right now, with Dave on top of him, with his legs wrapped around Dave’s waist and their foreheads pressed together, he’s acutely aware of each and every touch, each shift of his hips, the way Dave’s cock presses into him at just the right angle…

 _“Shit,_ right there - _ah -”_ Klaus’ voice catches on a choked out moan, his fingers scrambling for purchase on Dave’s shoulders, his back, his arms, anything that he can reach.

Not half an hour ago, they’d been curled up on the sofa in the theatre room, about halfway through _The Return of the King_ when the movie eventually became less important than soft touches, gentle kisses and hushed words of adoration. Eventually, Klaus found himself climbing into Dave’s lap, taking his face between his hands and kissing him like his life depended on it, even as the battle for Minas Tirith raged on in the background.

_“You know, we’re just proving Five right,” Dave had murmured in between kisses, even as his hands slid up Klaus’ thighs._

_“Yeah, well, we’ve got plenty of time to watch this movie again,” Klaus had replied with a shrug before leaning down to plant another kiss on Dave’s lips. When he pulled away, he caught his bottom lip with his teeth, tugging just slightly. Then he added, teasingly, “I mean, unless you’d rather we just -”_

_“Don’t be ridiculous,” Dave had cut him off almost immediately, earning a giggle from Klaus, which quickly turned into a squeal when Dave wrapped his arms around him quickly, hauling him forward again._

_“I want you,” Dave said then, accenting his words with a squeeze to Klaus’ behind, “But can we take this somewhere a little more… private?”_

_“What, don’t want Five walking in on me riding you on the couch?” Klaus had teased and -_

_God, wasn’t that an image._

_Still, Dave had managed to choke out, “No, not particularly.”_

Which is how they ended up here, tangled in Klaus’ sheets, Dave pressing him into his mattress, mouthing wet kisses into the crook of his neck and thrusting into him at _just the right angle._

It’s not enough, but it’s all too much at the same time - Dave’s weight on him, his hands all over his body, the way he sighs out Klaus’ name alongside words of encouragement. Sure, it’s not the risqué sex that Klaus had been envisioning as he straddled Dave on the sofa earlier, and it’s definitely not the kinkiest shit they’ve done - Klaus is pretty sure that he still has finger-shaped bruises on his hips from _that_ \- but it’s also _perfect,_ just like this. Being so close to Dave it… well, it almost makes Klaus forget that he’s not alive.

But Klaus doesn’t dwell on that right now. No, instead, he focuses on the sound of Dave’s voice, the way he murmurs praises into Klaus’ ear, and the way that Dave knows just how much to give him before taking it away at the last second, dragging this out as long as possible, until Klaus is whining beneath him, begging for release.

And when Klaus finally does come, it’s nearly at the same time as Dave, choking out a breathless moan as he clutches onto his lover. It’s passionate and loving and all too much, yet _exactly_ what Klaus needs and _god,_ Dave always knows exactly what he needs, _doesn’t he?_

It isn’t until after, while Klaus is basking in the afterglow of sex, melting into his mattress while he takes a drag of a cigarette that Dave says it.

“You did it,” he murmurs softly, his fingers tracing patterns into Klaus’ bicep.

Klaus hums and offers Dave the cigarette, which he takes wordlessly. “Sure, yeah,” he replies mindlessly, “Did what?”

“I was tangible the whole time,” Dave answers, his fingers stilling when Klaus glances up at him. “You didn’t drift.”

And _oh._ He’s right.

Although it doesn’t happen _every_ time, Klaus _does_ have a nasty habit of losing concentration whenever he and Dave are… _intimate._ It’s just so hard do focus on keeping him corporeal when his mind his elsewhere, but thankfully, he’s usually quick to come back down to earth. Nothing will kill your high like your boyfriend disappearing in the middle of sex.

Klaus shoots Dave a lazy, tired smile, but it’s filled with love. “Yeah, well, it’s kind of hard to zone out when you’re having the most mind-blowing sex of your life,” he remarks, which earns a chuckle from Dave.

 _“That good,_ huh?”

“Well, I mean, I don’t know,” Klaus mutters with a half-shrug. He reaches out for the cigarette and Dave passes it back to him. After another drag, he continues. “I don’t think anything will beat that night we stayed in the motel for what… _six_ hours? Shit, Dave. You’re going to have to work hard to top that.”

Dave chuckles, shaking his head and Klaus _knows_ that he remembers the night in question. It was back when they were in Vietnam, really learning each other’s bodies for the first time. Klaus had even managed to convince Dave to choke him a little, and while Dave had been reluctant at first, _god,_ he was a natural.

“I mean, we could try,” Dave suggests after a beat of silence, shaking Klaus from his thoughts.

And Klaus can’t help the wild grin that settles on his face. “Oh, don’t _say_ shit like that, Davey. You’re gonna get me going again.”

Round two, unfortunately doesn’t happen, though. After Klaus snubs out the cigarette in the ashtray on his bedside table, he’s quick to burrow under the covers, still naked, pulling Dave’s body against his own. It’s not uncommon for Klaus to become uncharacteristically touchy and affectionate after sex, and Dave is quick to respond, pulling Klaus up and into his arms, their bodies slotting easily together in bed.

“Do ghosts sleep?” Klaus asks just a few minutes later, voice soft, tired and lazy. They’re not facing each other, Dave spooning him from behind, fingers playing with his hair, but they don’t need to be.

Dave hums in response, his actions stilling until Klaus nudges his hand gently with his head. “Not really,” he answers after a beat of silence. “We kind of just… _are,_ I guess.”

“So you just watch me sleep?” Klaus teases then, a smile falling across his face, even though he knows that Dave can’t see it from this angle. “Fucking creep.”

“I can do other things too,” Dave says in protest, mock offence laced in his voice, even though Klaus knows he doesn’t mean it. “But yeah, most of the time, I’d just prefer to watch you sleep.”

“I knew it,” Klaus chuckles, but he squirms impossibly closer to Dave as if to prove that he doesn’t mind.  

Then, quieter, a few minutes later and just on the verge of sleep, Klaus asks. “What _would_ you dream about… if you could?”

Dave is quiet for a few moments, and if Klaus _didn’t_ know any better, he actually would think that he’s asleep, but then, after giving it some thought, Dave just murmurs, “You.”

Klaus snorts out a laugh at that, and he can feel Dave chuckling against him, so he nudges him gently with his elbow. Finally, Klaus turns over, and in the dark, he searches out Dave’s face. It takes his eyes a few moments to adjust, but once they do, he asks again, “Seriously. What do you think you’d dream about?”

Dave hums thoughtfully then, apparently thinking over his answer this time. Even at this angle, his fingers find their way back into Klaus’ messy curls, gently carding through his hair. “I suppose I’d dream about that cabin we talked about, if I could,” he answers at last. “You know, the one in the mountains.”

Klaus knows the one. He and Dave had talked about this a few times while they were in Vietnam. Mostly, it was Klaus who’d ask, late at night when he couldn’t sleep, _“If you could leave now, and start over new, where would you go?”_

And always, Dave would give it a little bit of thought before answering something along the lines of, _“Well, I’d get as far away from here as possible, for starters. But… I don’t know. I think I’d like a quiet life, somewhere far away from everyone else where we could just… be.”_

 _“We?”_ _Klaus had asked the first time Dave answered his question. He wasn’t stupid, he quickly caught on to the way that Dave had just assumed that they’d be together_

_“Well, yeah,” Dave had replied, a nervous little smile finding its way onto his face, “I mean, if you’d want. I know you’re a city boy, but I’d love a little place in the mountains, something secluded and I don’t know… ours.”_

_“David Katz,” Klaus had gasped. He didn’t have to feign surprise, then, because honestly, he_ was _surprised that when Dave saw his future, he saw him in it. “Are you asking me to move in with you?”_

_And Dave had laughed, pulling Klaus closer to press a kiss to his temple. “Yeah,” he answered, “I suppose I am.”_

_Klaus had hummed then, eyes closed and said, “A little log cabin wouldn’t be so bad. Romantic, I think.”_

They’d bring it up occasionally, whenever they needed to decompress or get their mind off of things, or sometimes following sex, basking in the afterglow. Mostly, it was Klaus who would mention it randomly, but he never missed the smile that would fall across Dave’s face when he would.

_“I’ve been thinking about the cabin,” Klaus said to him one night in lieu of a greeting. He held a joint loosely between his lips, flask in one hand, and plopped down next to Dave on the ground. They were secluded, just on the outskirts of camp, right after supper one night while everyone else was off minding their own business during their few hours of freedom._

_“Yeah?” Dave had asked hopefully, turning to glance at Klaus._

_“Yeah,” Klaus confirmed, taking a drag before handing the joint over to Dave. “I think the furniture would have to be hand-carved, otherwise it’s going to completely throw off the ambience. But I’m not really good with my hands, so you’re gonna have to become a lumberjack, or something.”_

_“I’d beg to differ,” Dave had teased, which earned a gentle smack and a snort from Klaus. But then, after a beat of silence, he asked, “Hand carved, huh?”_

_“Well yeah,” Klaus has shrugged, “I mean, I guess if we’re going for the whole rustic mountain-man thing, we might as well go all out. I can grow a beard or something. Might look weird paired with a skirt but -” He shrugged._

_“Jesus, Klaus,” Dave had muttered, then, “Don’t put that image in my head.”_

_“Oh yeah?” Klaus had grinned, “You like that?”_

_“Maybe,” Dave had replied. He knocked his shoulder against Klaus’ gently, reaching out for the joint again. After a moment to think, he had amended, “Okay, yeah. Actually, I’m definitely into it.”_

_“Well you should see my wardrobe at home, then,” Klaus muttered in return, a sly smile finding its way onto his face._

_“God,” Dave had muttered on an exhale, smoke swirling between them before dissipating, “How are you real?”_

_“Maybe I’m a figment of your imagination,” Klaus had offered in return. He was only able to keep a straight face for a few seconds, though, before breaking out into a wild grin and falling into laughter with Dave._

That’s how all of their conversations regarding the cabin had ended, too. Always with hope and happiness and a little too much optimism. It became a regular topic of discussion, and something to help cheer the other up when they were down.

_“Cats or dogs?” Klaus had asked Dave once, as they marched through the jungle, guns at the ready. “Cause I’m thinking something big would be good to have as a guard dog, but cats are so low maintenance.”_

_Dave had looked at him, perplexed. Tensions had been high all day, everyone on edge, and it caused a permanent scowl to etch itself onto his face, so Klaus was intent on changing that. However, it doesn’t stop Dave from asking, “What?”_

_“For the cabin, obviously,” Klaus said with a shrug. “Would you want a cat or a dog?”_

_Dave’s step had faltered when he realized what Klaus was referencing, and Klaus simply grinned back at him before his brain caught up and he answered, “Why not one of each?”_

_And Klaus couldn’t help the way he chuckled, nudging Dave gently when they fell back into step. “I like the way you think, Katz.”_

So now, even after so much time has passed, when Dave brings up the cabin, Klaus can’t help the way that his breath catches in his throat, even if just for a second. And he can’t help the smile that finds its way onto his face.

“The cabin, huh?” Klaus asks, gazing up at Dave in the dark.

And even now, Klaus can tell that Dave is smiling back at him. “Yeah,” he murmurs. “It would probably be a pretty mundane dream… dinner on the stove, something good on the radio, our dog curled up on the couch.”

 _“Our dog,”_ Klaus muses softly, closing his eyes. He can almost picture it - a quaint little log cabin in the woods, surrounded by rolling hills, green grass and a breathtaking backdrop, far away from the city and the spirits that inhabit it. Somewhere quiet. Somewhere _theirs._

“Nah,” Klaus mutters at last, “That’s not a mundane dream. It sounds _perfect.”_

Dave reaches out, carding his fingers through Klaus’ hair, and Klaus can’t help but tilt his head into the touch, his eyes slipping closed again. “You think so?”

“I do” Klaus replies almost immediately.

Now, lying in bed, Dave gently playing with his hair, Klaus finally feels sleep overtaking him, making his limbs feel heavy, his mind drifting away. He knows it’s not long before he’s too far gone and Dave likely slips through his grasp, and frankly, he doesn’t want to be awake for it. He’d rather drift into sleep with Dave curled around him, touching him, holding him.

“G’night,” Klaus murmurs at last, his voice slurred with sleep.

And, with a press of lips to the top of his head, Dave whispers softly, “Sweet dreams.”

* * *

 

When Klaus wakes in the morning, it’s to an empty bed.

It’s not alarming by any means, waking up alone, but Klaus can’t help but feel just a little bit disappointed when Dave _isn’t_ lying next to him when he wakes up. It’s not uncommon for Dave to wander off during the night or for Klaus to find him in the kitchen or bar, feet kicked up on the table, chatting easily with Ben some mornings, so while Klaus _wishes_ he was rolling over and into Dave’s arms when he wakes, he doesn’t dwell on it much. He thinks nothing of it at first, because it’s not the first time he’s woken up without Dave right by his side in the past year and he assumes he’ll run into him shortly.

So Klaus takes his time getting ready, starting his morning with a hot shower before carefully applying some thick, dark eyeliner around his lower lids and shimmying into whichever risqué outfit calls to him. Today in particular, it’s a pair of olive-colored skinny jeans, a tiny little black crop-top and a loose-fitting open sweater to pull it all together. Klaus glances over himself in his bedroom mirror, making a few final adjustments before finally heading downstairs late that morning to find Dave. They didn’t have any concrete plans for the day, but Klaus has the urge to get out of the house and _do something_ and he’s sure that Dave will jump at the chance to get out as well.

However, upon searching in the usual spots that Dave _normally_ hangs out, even checking in the makeshift theatre room for good measure only to find it exactly how they left it the night before, Klaus comes up empty-handed. The kitchen is empty (there’s not even any sign of Five in dirty cups or the lingering smell of his fancy coffee) and so is the bar. Diego is _still_ asleep, so Klaus knows that Dave can’t be with him, and with a frown, he decides to do another lap around the house in search of him, assuming he must be with Ben if he can’t be found elsewhere

Only, about ten minutes later, Klaus finds Ben, and Dave isn’t with him.

“Hey,” Klaus calls upon spying Ben curled up on a sofa in the den, buried in a book he’s probably read a hundred times by now. “Have you seen Dave?”

Ben glances up from his book, shooting Klaus a confused glance. “No,” he replies with a shrug, “I figured he was with you.

Klaus sighs. Well, so much for having _one_ helpful brother. “Woke up this morning and couldn’t find him,” he mutters, taking a few more steps into the room. “I figured he was with you. You haven’t seen him at all?”

Aware that he likely isn’t going to get any reading done for the moment, Ben closes his book, never the type to dog-ear a page or set it face-down. “Not all morning,” he replies. “I’m sure he’s around, though.”

Klaus opens his mouth to speak, but he’s unsure of what to say. On one hand, he wants to tease Ben - _yeah, what’s he doing, running ghost errands?_ \- but on the other, he actually feels a hint of genuine worry at Ben’s words. It’s something so weird to be concerned about, but ever since Klaus first conjured Dave over a year ago, they’ve never been apart for more than a few hours. Klaus is his tether to the physical world, and Dave has never strayed too far from him.

So, after a beat of silence, Klaus sighs, crossing his arms. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

But Ben can see right through him because, well, he’s _Ben._ If anyone can see past his facade, it’s Ben. “If you’re so concerned, you could just conjure him,” he suggests.

But Klaus doesn’t. At least, he _doesn’t_ try conjuring Dave until much later. In retrospect, he doesn’t do it right away because he knows that if he does, it means that this whole situation is a lot more serious than he initially thought it was, and things have been _so good_ lately.

Deep down, Klaus _knew_ that his luck is bound to run out eventually. It _always_ does, but just didn’t want to believe that it would happen like this.

That he’d actually lose Dave.

So Klaus spends the remainder of the afternoon telling himself that it’s not a big deal. That, while Dave isn’t necessarily _alive,_ he has a life, too. Klaus remembers Dave telling him about his siblings not too long ago. Maybe he decided, in the middle of the night, that he wanted to see them, if they’re still alive. Hell, maybe he _does_ have ghost errands to run. Who the hell is Klaus to stop him or tell him where he can or can’t go? They might be _together,_ but Klaus isn’t his keeper. He’s his own man.

Klaus has always been good at compartmentalizing and pushing down his worries and fears, so that’s exactly what he does for the majority of his day. But he’s bound to cave eventually.

When Klaus finally takes a seat on the floor of his bedroom, there’s late afternoon light shining in through the windows, painting the room in an angelic glow, and while it doesn’t necessarily feel _right_ to conjure in such conditions (one would normally imagine a dark room, candles, something a little more peaceful) Klaus doesn’t have any other choice. With a deep breath, he takes a seat on the floor, cross-legged, arms out, palms upturned, and closes his eyes.

Since returning to their original timeline, Klaus truthfully hasn’t used his powers for much more than making Dave and Ben corporeal on a regular basis (and conjuring Patch a few times for Diego) but he’s certainly not rusty by any means. As soon as he settles on the floor, Klaus takes a deep breath through his nose, holding it in his lungs for a few seconds before releasing it through his mouth, feeling his body relax with the action. His shoulders slump slightly, head lulling back, chin tipping up towards the ceiling, and he focuses on clearing his mind of all worries and insecurities.

He focuses on _Dave._

As Klaus sits, breathing deeply, body gradually relaxing, he focuses on Dave’s sweet voice, the gentle touch of his fingertips, the way Dave held him last night while they made love and refused to let go after. He focuses on Dave’s optimism and hope, and their little imaginary cabin in the woods, the memory of their conversation last night still fresh in his mind.

Klaus can’t help the smile that falls on his face as he focuses on everything that he loves about Dave and how badly he wants to open his eyes and see him standing before him again.

But that doesn’t happen.

Klaus feels energy flowing through his body as he focuses, a surefire sign that this _has_ to be working, but when he eventually opens his eyes, it’s to an empty space where Dave should be, and the sight of it immediately fills him with disappointment and dread.

“Nothing?” A voice - _Ben’s_ voice - asks from behind him, soft and careful, but concerned nonetheless.

Klaus deflates, slumping forward in defeat before turning to glance at his brother, perched behind him on his bed. “Nothing,” he mutters. “Did you feel it?”

 _“Oh yeah,”_ Ben replies with a smile. “You’re like a damn beacon.” His smile fades quickly, however, when he sees the defeated look on Klaus’ face and realizes that they’re alone in his bedroom.

“So then where is he?” Klaus chokes out, searching his brother’s face for an answer. Of course, he knows that Ben doesn’t have one. How could he expect him to know?

“I - I don’t know,” Ben stammers, brows furrowing. “Maybe you just need to keep trying.”

And he does. _God,_ he does. Klaus sits in his bedroom for the majority of the afternoon, focusing on Dave, hoping, praying to any god that will listen, that he materializes in front of him again. That this is all just some temporary fluke, that Dave isn’t gone for good.

But Klaus isn’t naive enough to think that everything is okay. Even when they first returned to their original timeline, it only took him a bit of meditation to bring Dave back rather quickly, as if he was never gone.

So what’s so different about this? What changed?

Klaus doesn’t realize just how long he’s been sitting in his room, trying and failing to conjure Dave until he opens his eyes shortly after dusk to find that his bedroom has plunged into darkness. Time escapes him while he tries to bring Dave back, but once night falls, Klaus finally feels as if he has exhausted his efforts and decides to go with another route.

He needs to find Five. _He’ll know what to do._

To Klaus’ surprise, his other brother is relatively easy to locate, too. Although Klaus had been unable to find him that morning or afternoon, almost immediately after stepping out of his bedroom, he spies Five’s smaller form darting down the hallway and into Luther’s bedroom. If he notices Klaus, he doesn’t say anything, but Klaus doesn’t care. After just a moment of hesitation, steeling himself and reining in his emotions, Klaus hurries down the hallway, planning the words in his head before he even rounds the corner into Luther’s bedroom.

Five’s back is to him when Klaus steps through the doorway, and for a split second, Klaus considers just walking away and not saying anything. He’s already been vulnerable enough with Ben today, does he really need to share his fears and worries with Five, too?

Yeah, he does. If he wants to get Dave back - if he wants to figure out what the hell is going on - he needs to talk to Five.

Klaus raps his knuckles on Luther’s open door, despite the fact that it’s _not_ Five’s bedroom and he really doesn’t care if he’s intruding on something. “Hey, Five.”

Five doesn’t stop or even show any sign of hearing Klaus’ voice as he continues rummaging through some of Luther’s things, pulling a few t-shirts out of a dresser drawer before moving to his closet, so Klaus closes his eyes, clears his throat, and tries again. “Five. Have you seen Dave?”

And at _that,_ Five finally stills, body going rigid. He doesn’t say anything right away, but just as Klaus is about to repeat himself, Five mutters a clipped, “He’s a ghost. How am I supposed to _see_ him?”

And _oh._ Right.

“Oh,” Klaus mutters, trying to hide the disappointment in his voice. “Well, yeah. You’re right, I just... I haven’t been able to find him all day.” Honestly, he’d been hoping that he’d ask Five this simple question and Five would just call him crazy or tell him that he’s been spending the day with Dave. All Klaus wants is for someone to prove him wrong, to tell him that he’s getting worried over nothing, but that doesn’t happen.

Five turns then, eyes hard. “Have you tried conjuring him?”

“Yeah,” Klaus sighs, leaning against the door frame. “Nothing.”

“How long has -”

“Since this morning,” Klaus answers Five’s question before he can even ask it. “He was with me when I went to bed last night, but I haven’t seen him since.”

Then, before Five can say anything else and before Klaus can talk himself out of it, he asks, “You don’t think we fucked something up in the timeline, do you?”

“No,” Five mutters, “Absolutely not.” He spares one last glance at Luther’s bedroom before deciding, with a handful of clothes, that he’s done with _whatever_ he’s doing. And, without another word, Five brushes past Klaus and into the hallway.

Klaus, however, isn’t ready for the conversation with Five to be over, and he immediately follows him. “How can you be so sure?” he asks, a hint of desperation to his voice. “I just - I can’t figure out why he’d be gone.”

Five sighs, turning on his heel to face Klaus again. “If we messed something up, the effects would have been immediate,” he reasons, “Not months after the fact.”

And shit, okay. Yeah, that actually makes some sense. For a moment, that makes Klaus feel a _bit_ better, but only for a few seconds before he’s asking, “Well, then why do you think he’s - I mean, why can’t I conjure him? Ben said it was like a beacon, so you’d think -”

“I -” Five cuts him off, his face contorting into something pained, remorseful. “I don’t know,” he sighs at last, looking down. “I’m sorry, Klaus. I wish I had the answer you’re looking for, but I don’t.”

And _that_ nearly breaks Klaus’ heart more than anything else. All day, he has been unable to find Dave, unable to conjure him, and Five was his last ditch effort. _Maybe,_ Five would have the answer, maybe Five would know what he needed to do to get Dave back, but he doesn’t. And if he can’t figure it out, then who can?

“Right,” Klaus croaks, “It’s okay. Thanks anyway, Five.”

Head bowed, Klaus doesn’t catch the way the Five opens and closes his mouth, as if he wants to say something else, but holds himself back. He doesn’t catch the way that Five falters and hesitates before sighing and turning on his heel, heading back the way he came, leaving Klaus alone in the hallway once more.

Dejected yet determined not to give up quite yet, Klaus quietly makes his way down the hall and back to his bedroom to try again. He’ll try to conjure Dave all night, if that’s what it takes. He’ll keep trying to conjure Dave, even if it’s the last thing he does.

Once he’s alone in his room - although, he’s never _really_ alone, with Ben still sitting on his bed - Klaus takes a seat at the foot of his bed once more. This time, Klaus feels much more tense as he crosses his legs and rests his elbows on his knees, attempting to relax his body and clear his mind. This time, he realizes exactly what’s at stake, but he _has_ to try. He has to keep trying.

Klaus isn’t sure when he finally slips into unconsciousness or how long he’s been sitting on his floor, trying and failing to conjure his lover before sleep finally takes him, but one moment, he’s focusing on Dave’s touch, his reassuring voice and the way that he makes Klaus’ heart skip a beat each and every time he sees him, and the next, Klaus is falling into darkness.

* * *

 

_Late morning sunlight filters in through the open bedroom window, casting soft shadows and angelic highlights across the room and rousing Klaus regretfully from his peaceful sleep. The light is the first thing that he registers, nearly blinding even through closed eyelids, and with a groan, he instinctively throws an arm over his eyes to dull the brightness, the thought of blackout curtains briefly crossing his mind before he begins to focus on something else entirely._

_It’s apparent that his bedroom window is open, judging by the gentle breeze that Klaus can feel on the bare skin of his arms and exposed stomach, but rather than the sounds of the city abruptly rousing him from his sleep, it’s quiet. Peaceful. And_ that _is enough to get Klaus’ attention. He doesn’t open his eyes quite yet, but he does focus on the soft sounds filtering in through the bedroom window - birds chirping, the wind gently blowing, and soft, bright windchimes in the distance._

_That’s different._

_Eventually, Klaus removes his arm from his face, cracking his eyes open in an effort to focus on what’s going on around him. It takes a moment for his vision to focus, but when it does, he realizes two things. One, that he’s completely alone in bed. Dave is still nowhere to be found. And two, that he doesn’t know where he is._

_Upon the second realization, Klaus sits up abruptly, head spinning, eyes darting around the unfamiliar room. Strangely, it looks very similar to his own bedroom, all furniture and fixtures in the same places, but it’s fairly empty and well put together. There’s no writing on the wall, no posters, no exposed brick from where Klaus had taken a sledgehammer to Vanya’s adjoining bedroom as a teenager, after Hargreeves had moved her to a different section of the Academy. Clothes aren’t strewn across the floor as they had been when Klaus fell asleep last night, but instead, are stored neatly in his wardrobe, even organized by color. The room is beautiful, really, all gray and white, exposed wood and hand-carved furniture, but it doesn’t explain how Klaus got here and_ where _exactly_ here _is._

_Klaus moves then, swinging his legs over the side of his bed - and woah, even his sheets are different, a nice soft off-white color, rather than the black that Klaus had practically insisted on when he and Dave went shopping together one Sunday - and he stands, taking in his surroundings. He isn’t sure how he got here, but he doesn’t feel frightened by any means. In fact, it feels very similar to the time he died, when he met God in the woods and she tricked him into meeting with his father._

_So does this mean that he’s dead? Or is he simply just dreaming?_

_Unsure, Klaus begins to move, striding quickly out of the brightly-lit, unfamiliar but familiar all the same bedroom and in the adjoining room, which appears to be some sort of loft. To his left is a small twin bed and to the right, a pair of sofas, television and old record player. The wall on the left is lined with vinyl records, and on the far side of the room, dead center, is a massive window that takes up half of the room, stretching from floor to ceiling, overlooking a stunning mountain view that pulls a gasp from Klaus’ lips._

_Legs moving forward on their own volition, Klaus steps forward to gaze out the window, taking in the breathtaking scenery: green, rolling hills as far as the eye can see and off in the distance, beautiful mountain peaks and bright, blue sky. It doesn’t look real, and deep down, Klaus knows that it probably isn’t, but that doesn’t stop the excitement that fills his chest because suddenly, he thinks he might know where he is._

_But he needs to be sure._

_Quickly, Klaus turns, making a beeline for the set of stairs on far end of the room and practically sprints down them, anxious and excited, nervous because he’s unsure what he’ll find as soon as he rounds the corner._

_But once he does, Klaus’ hopes are confirmed. There, on the lower level of the small house, Klaus is met with another breathtaking sight. Warm light fills the main floor of the house through large windows, accenting even more exposed wood, hand carved furniture and the homey, lived-in aesthetic of the cabin._

Their _cabin._

_“Dave?” Klaus calls out into the empty room, his voice filled with hope, even as it echoes around him and lands on deaf ears._

_He turns then, searching out the room for a sign of his lover, as if he thinks he’ll find Dave hiding right behind him, frantically looking for something, anything to prove that he’s not alone here. That Dave is here with him._

_And that’s when Klaus’ eyes land on the beautiful, hand-carved picture frame. The photo inside - a simple black and white family portrait - depicts three children and two adults. The youngest kid, a little girl, can’t be older than eight or nine while the oldest looks as if he might be verging on sixteen or seventeen. But Klaus doesn’t focus on them. Instead, his eyes are drawn straight to the child in the middle of the frame - a lanky little twelve year old boy with curly hair and (if the photo were in color, he knows) bright blue eyes._

_Dave._

_Although Klaus has never seen the photo before, he just_ knows _that it’s Dave. It has to be._

_Without thinking, Klaus reaches up, his fingers brushing against the glass of the picture frame, a smile falling across his face. Suddenly, everything feels calm. Everything feels right._

_Dave will be here soon, Klaus just knows it, and immediately, he wants to make sure that their reunion is nothing short of perfect. Whether this is a dream, or if they’re finally reunited in the afterlife, Klaus can’t wait to see Dave. He aches for his touch, his calming voice, his sweet smile._

_So Klaus busies himself, making sure the cabin is nothing short of perfect for when Dave arrives, even going as far as to put some food on the stove, so they can finally share a proper meal together. Klaus isn’t the_ best _cook, admittedly, but he does know how to make a killer Tuscan soup, so he settles on just that. To his delight, the refrigerator, while it looks antique and he’s genuinely surprised it’s even functioning, is fully stoked, and in no time, Klaus finds himself turning on the old radio that sits on the kitchen counter while he puts together quite the meal for him and Dave to share, whenever Dave decides to show up. Klaus hopes that it’s soon._

 _As soon as the soup is simmering on the stove, some bread in the oven, Klaus retreats back to the unfamiliar yet incredibly familiar bedroom to change into something a little more_ him, _bounding up the stairs two at a time, heart racing in his chest. The closet is an absolute_ dream, _too. While many of the articles of clothing are pieces that Klaus recognizes - like his favorite leather pants, which he quickly pulls on - there are many that are new to Klaus, and he finds himself trying on a few different outfits as he attempts to decide what suits him the best._

_And that’s when he hears the front door open and close._

_Klaus freezes where he stands in the bedroom, illuminated by late afternoon light - and wow, time seems to be flying by in this weird little dream world or afterlife or whatever the hell it is - waiting, hoping, praying that it’s Dave that he hears walking slowly through the cabin downstairs. Now, time seems to stand still as Klaus listens to the sound of boots on hardwood floor, crossing through the threshold and into the den, then the kitchen. It’s silent for what feels like an eternity, Klaus frozen on the spot while he waits for a sign._

_And then, he hears his name._

_“Klaus?”_

_And_ god, _what Dave’s familiar, comforting voice does to him. Klaus nearly collapses on the spot. He nearly breaks down in tears. He almost takes off in a full sprint to meet Dave downstairs._

_But instead, he steels himself, calling out, “Just a moment!”_

_Quickly, Klaus choses and outfit and finishes getting dressed, pulling a loose v-neck over his head before accenting it with a deep red, lacy cardigan that falls down to his knees once he pulls it over his shoulders. With one final once-over, Klaus pulls the dog tags out from beneath his shirt with shaky hands, listening as Dave makes his way up the stairs and into the loft, only separated by a thin wall._

_God, how Klaus has missed him. It has only been a day, but it feels like an eternity._

_With a deep breath, Klaus steps out of the bedroom and into the loft, his eyes finding Dave immediately._

_Dave looks just as stunning as the day that Klaus met him, all golden curls, hopeful, bright blue eyes and lips parted in surprise. He freezes on the spot, very obviously drinking in the sight of Klaus, which gives Klaus a surge of confidence as an easy smile falls onto his face._

_Klaus does a little twirl, showing the outfit off to Dave, as if it were only moments ago that they had last seen each other, picking up right where they left off, despite the pounding in his chest. And, when they lock eyes again, Klaus asks, “What do you think?”_

_Finally, Dave speaks, his voice rough, full of emotion and adoration. “You look… absolutely stunning.”_

_And_ fuck, _Klaus will never tire of the way that Dave manages to make him feel like a nervous teenage every single time he looks at him like this, every time he compliments him or voices his love and adoration. He’ll never tire of the way that his brain seems to short-circuit around Dave, all coherent thoughts flying out the window for a split second before he comes back down to himself._

_“You think?” Klaus asks, biting his lip as he gazes up at Dave. There are a million things he wants to say, a million questions that he wants to ask, but he’ll keep it simple, for now. They can discuss everything else later. Right now, he just wants to hold Dave. Touch him. Kiss him. Never let go._

_“I know,” Dave replies with ease. Then, he reaches out, a smile falling on his face. “Come here.”_

_And Klaus doesn’t have to be told twice. With a few confident strides, he crosses the room, closing the gap with arms around Dave’s shoulders just before their lips meet for a long-awaited kiss. When the kiss eventually ends, as they all unfortunately do, it’s with Klaus’ hands in Dave’s hair, Dave’s hands holding onto Klaus’ waist for dear life. Klaus keeps his gentle grip on the back of Dave’s neck, leaning forward to press their foreheads together in a brief, vulnerable display of affection, breath coming out in trembling gasps as he tries to keep himself together._

_Not a mundane dream at all, Klaus thinks, but doesn’t say._

_And, as if he can read his mind, Dave mutters at last, voice thick with emotion and pain and regret, “I’m dreaming.”_

_The words threaten to shatter Klaus’ heart on the spot because he_ knew _it was too good to be true, he_ knew _he didn’t have Dave back, not yet, not for good. But he doesn’t want to let go. Not yet. He doesn’t want to give this up, even if it is just a really good dream._

_Klaus pulls away, just slightly, enough to look Dave in the eye, and offers him a smile._

_“If this is a dream, then I don’t want to wake up.”_

_But, that’s exactly what Klaus does._

* * *

 

When Klaus wakes late the next day, it isn’t with a jerk or a gasp or spinning head, wondering how he got here and what just happened. No, when he blinks awake that afternoon, lying uncomfortably on his bedroom floor, it’s with a cold realization that, once again, he is completely and utterly alone.

The dream is still fresh on his mind, and when Klaus squeezes his eyes shut, he can almost still taste Dave on his lips, feel his hands on his waist, hear his voice in his ear, but it’s with a chilling sense of finality that he realizes that, no matter how hard he tries, he won’t be able to conjure Dave again. Not now. Not ever. No, the dream, as wonderful and perfect and bittersweet as it was, felt like a goodbye. An end.

Still, Klaus tries. _God,_ he tries. He’d hate himself if he didn’t. But even now, lying on his hard bedroom floor, eyes squeezed shut to stop the tears from coming, he can’t conjure Dave. Even as he feels the energy flowing through his body, even though he knows his hands are glowing blue, he can’t bring him back. He’ll never be able to.

_“Klaus…”_

Ben’s gentle voice brings Klaus out of his state, anchoring him back to earth, even if just temporarily. And when Klaus eventually sits up, wiping the wetness from his eyes with the back of his hand, he turns to find Ben sitting on his bed, as if he never left.

And Ben, observant, patient Ben reads the emotion written all over Klaus’ face, his own features falling when he asks, “Where did you go?”

 _Fuck._ Is it that obvious?

Klaus sits for a moment, staring off into space, trying and failing to gather his thoughts, to make sense of what’s happening and _why._ Eventually, though, he answers, turning to face Ben with a defeated, empty gaze.

“I dreamt of Dave, last night,” he hears himself saying, his voice sounding very far away. It’s like he’s not all there, his mouth working on its own volition. “I - he was… _Ben,_ I don’t think he’s coming back.”

Klaus can’t help himself, then. He falls apart with those words, breaking down, curling in on himself and collapsing on his bedroom floor, his entire world crumbling down around him with the finality of his words.

Ben is there in an instant, corporeal, although Klaus really isn’t surprised, and he’s quick to wrap his arms around him, holding him as upright as he can, pulling Klaus against his chest. “Hey, _hey,_ you’re okay,” Ben insists, voice soft and soothing. Or at least, it would be, if Klaus weren’t already miles away in his own head. “It’s going to be okay. He’ll come back. You can’t know for sure that he’s not, Klaus. You _can’t.”_

“No, Ben,” Klaus chokes out between gasps of air and wrecked, desperate sobs. “You don’t understand. I - he, it - I can’t explain. I just _know.”_

And, for the first time in a very long time, Ben doesn’t have anything to say to counter Klaus’ words. What could he _possibly_ say, when he doesn’t know for sure if Dave will ever come back? So instead, he just pulls Klaus closer, cradling the back of his head with one hand, holding him close with the other.

Klaus isn’t sure how long they sit like that, holding onto one another like they did when they were kids, when Klaus would return from a night in the mausoleum or Ben would come back from a deadly mission. He’s not sure how long they’re on the floor of his bedroom, but when Klaus finally comes back to himself, taking deep, steady breaths, the sun is already setting behind the city, casting a warm glow across his bedroom.

The light should feel comforting and relaxing. In fact, it’s Klaus’ favorite time of day, just when the sun begins to dip below the horizon, painting his bedroom in pinks and oranges and reds. But now, he can only think about the times that he and Dave sat in this very room, holding each other as the sun went down, discussing their plans for the future and their dreams of a little cabin in the mountains.

* * *

 

Klaus doesn’t move for the rest of the day. He doesn’t eat, he doesn’t talk. He just… is.

But on the morning of the third day without Dave, Klaus feels _different._ Not better, just different. Resigned. Defeated.

Ben isn’t there when he wakes, and Klaus assumes he’s probably off trying to fix things, trying to make things better in whatever way that he can. He’s thankful, though, when he finally gets up to find that he’s alone, because truthfully, he’d rather Ben not see what comes next. He’d rather not disappoint his brother yet again.

Wordlessly, Klaus exits his room, feet carrying him forward, and before he knows what he’s doing, he’s downstairs, rummaging behind the bar until he wraps his fingers around a half-empty bottle of whiskey. It has been over eight months since his last drink, since his last relapse, but now, as Klaus pours a few fingers of the drink into a chilled glass, he can’t bring himself to care

After all, there’s no point in being sober anymore if he can’t see the one person he loves. He’s already done his job. They’ve saved the world. He doesn’t need these powers anymore, if they’re of no use to him.

 _Fuck it,_ Klaus thinks as he lifts the glass to his lips and takes a long drink, the liquor burning his throat as it goes down. It’s a familiar, welcome sensation, and while Klaus isn’t numb _yet,_ he knows he will be soon

“What are you doing?” Ben can’t hide the disappointment in his voice, even as he tries to play the part of the concerned brother while he watches Klaus from the other end of the room, arms crossed.

“What does it look like I’m doing?” Klaus mutters, eyebrows raised, arms outstretched. He feels like he’s in his element like this, getting fucked up, disappointing his family. It’s just like old times. Just a little bit longer, and it’ll be like Dave never even existed.

“You’ve been doing so well…” Ben murmurs, taking a few steps forward and _fuck,_ Klaus would be lying if the heartache in his tone didn’t get to him. He _wants_ to be numb, but he isn’t quite yet, and that almost makes this all ten times worse.

“Yeah, well, it’s not fucking heroin,” Klaus bites in response. He downs the rest of his drink, then reaches for the bottle again, but Ben is there in a flash, snatching it up and off of the table, out of his reach, and _fuck these powers, betraying him yet again._

Klaus scrubs a hand over his face, shaking his head. “Sorry,” he mutters after a tense beat of silence. “I’m sorry, I just - _fuck._ I don’t know what I’m doing, Ben. I don’t -”

“Well this certainly won’t help,” Ben insists, pulling the bottle out of reach again before Klaus can snatch it from him.

Klaus stomps a foot in frustration, a childish little outburst but he can’t help it. _“Shit._ Yeah, I know. Don’t you think I know that?”

“Then why are you doing this to yourself?” Ben demands, voice hard, nearly yelling. He looks angry, but underneath that, he’s frustrated, concerned, confused. It’s like looking in a mirror.

“I don’t _know!”_ Klaus yells back, voice cracking. Then softer, he adds, “I don’t know, Ben. I - _fuck_ \- I mean, I knew that it probably wasn’t permanent, that it was too good to be true… but I figured, you’ve stuck around for so long, so maybe he would, too.”

Of course, Ben doesn’t know what to say to that. _How could he?_ But still, he promises, “We’ll figure this out.”

“Will we?” Klaus chokes out, broken and defeated.

And when he looks to Ben for an answer, he doesn’t find one.

* * *

 

Deep down, Klaus is grateful that Ben takes the whiskey away from him, that he caught him in the act and put a stop to it. Really, he doesn’t _want_ to relapse. He doesn’t want to become that shell of himself that he used to be…

But it’s _hard._ It’s so fucking hard, when all Klaus wants to do is numb the pain and the fear and the regret. It’s hard, when he wants nothing more than to be with Dave, no matter what it takes.

Once again, Klaus is reminded of how cruel and unfair the world really is, when it has been four days and Dave still hasn’t returned. Four days. Ninety-six hours, and Dave is still gone, and deep down, Klaus knows that he’s not coming back. And it’s _not fucking fair,_ but that’s just how the world is. Klaus knows this intimately. He knows it better than anyone else, he thinks.

It’s not fair that, after going through so much together, after so much pain and suffering and growth and happiness and bliss, the universe just decides to rip Dave away from him again, _just like that._ Dave is gone, and he’s not coming back, and it doesn’t make any sense.

But, if it’s permanent, which Klaus is beginning to think that it very well may be (because he’s been meditating for over eight hours a day, attempting and failing to conjure Dave) then Klaus finds himself wondering why he’s even still here. He worked _so fucking hard,_ training to be able to have Dave, to hold Dave, to spend the rest of his life with him, and for what? To wind up alone again? It’s selfish, but it’s true, and if he can’t have Dave, then what’s the fucking point?

They did what they were born to do, after all - The Umbrella Academy. They stopped the end of the world, and for what? Everyone else is moving on with their lives. Allison and Luther are off in California, building a life together while Allison tries to gain custody of Claire once more, and Vanya, dear sweet Vanya is even trying to pick up to pieces and start over, reborn and more confident than ever. And Diego, as heartbroken and lonely as he is, has found purpose. In fact, if Klaus heard correctly, he’s been studying to get back into the police academy again. Hell, even Five has been hard at work trying to help his siblings, trying to make up for lost time. They’re all thriving, getting better and Klaus…

Well, he’s right back where he started.

Now, Four days later, Klaus finds himself sitting in his bedroom, alone, thinking of his dream, of that cabin in the mountains and a life that he’ll never get to build with Dave. Klaus’ mind wanders to the cabin, how real it felt in his dream, and thinks that if that was his version of the afterlife, _is death really all that bad?_

If he could be with Dave, maybe it would be worth it. It’s a morbid, melodramatic train of thought, and with a snort, Klaus can’t help but think of Romeo and Juliet, but he can’t help it. _God, he’s pathetic,_ but it’s not the first time that Klaus has thought about ending his life, just to be rid of all this shit.

It is, however, the first time he seriously considers going through with it.

So that night, sitting on his bed, scared and lost and alone, Klaus tries again to conjure a spirit, only this time, it’s _not_ Dave. And this time, they appear almost immediately.

 _“Ben,”_ Klaus chokes out, voice desperate and broken. “You need to talk me out of doing something stupid.”

* * *

 

“I’m not going to give you some bullshit about how it’s not worth it and things will get better,” Ben says about ten minutes later, following Klaus’ breakdown and an embrace that Klaus never wanted to end, as he sobbed into Ben’s jacket. “But I will say that it would absolutely destroy everyone else. Your family needs you, Klaus.”

“Do they, though?” Klaus asks in response, “Do they really? _We did it._ We already saved the world. What else could they possibly need me for?”

 _“Klaus -”_ Ben starts, an argument about his family loving him ready on his tongue, but Klaus cuts him off.

“I’m just so _tired,”_ Klaus mutters, “I’m tired of fighting. It was so much _easier_ with Dave here, but if he’s gone for good…

“He’d hate you for it,” Ben argues gently.

“Yeah, I _know_ he would,” Klaus bites back, “But what exactly am I supposed to do?”

 _“Live your life,”_ Ben insists, as if it’s the easiest thing in the world, “Because some of us would kill to be where you are.”

“Not making me feel better, Ben,” Klaus hisses. “If I could trade places with you, I would in a heartbeat. You deserve this second chance more than anyone else, but you know as well as I do that _life isn’t fucking fair.”_

When Ben doesn’t immediately say anything or try to argue with him, Klaus continues. “I mean, look at me. He’s been gone for what? Four days? And this is how I handle it? I’m a fucking mess,” he chokes, “I’m a waste.”

“You’re not a waste,” Ben argues gently. “I know there’s not much I can say to convince you otherwise, but you are so _strong,_ Klaus. The others might not always see it, and I _know_ you don’t see it in yourself, but take it from someone who has been by your side every day for the past what? Thirteen years?”

“Ben -” Klaus starts to interrupt, his voice thick with emotion, but Ben doesn’t let him finish

“I know you, Klaus, better than anyone else,” he continues, “And I know that it would be a damn shame if you ended it all now, like this. Don’t do that to yourself. Don’t do it to me, or our family. Or I swear, if you do, as soon as I can get my hands on you, I’ll kick your ass myself.”

Despite the heavy topic of conversation and the tension in the air, Ben’s final comment has Klaus snorting out a laugh. Leave it to Ben to try to cheer him up in a dark moment like this by threatening violence. “Shit,” he mutters, voice thick, “I love you, Ben.”

“Yeah, I love you too,” Ben mutters at last before he reaches forward, pulling Klaus in for a hug. Klaus’ arms hang limp at his sides for only a split second before he returns the gesture, clutching onto Ben’s hoodie.

“We’ll figure this out,” Ben insists against Klaus hair as he holds him close, “I promise.”

* * *

 

When Klaus drifts off to a dreamless sleep that night, he’s exhausted both physically and mentally. He falls asleep in his brother’s arms and, for the first time since Dave disappeared, he manages to sleep through the night as well, waking in the morning well-rested and with a clear head. Or at least, clearer than it had been the day before.

Ben is there - he always is - sitting on the floor against Klaus’ bed, a book in his hands, and he glances up at Klaus when he stretches and rises from the bed.

“I’m going to take a bath,” Klaus announces, “Then do you think we could get out of the house for a little bit? I need to clear my head.”

He can tell, by the way that Ben gazes up at him, that he appreciates the communication. It’s a step in the right direction. “Of course,” Ben replies gently, “Yeah, that sounds great.

Deep down, Klaus _really_ wants to get out to see if he can find any of his old dealers. To see if maybe, he could just score something cheap, something that’ll down the pain and anxiety and fear for a little while. But at the last minute, he decides to invite Ben in an effort to stay clean, to remind himself why he’s doing this in the first place.

Because _yeah,_ he wants nothing more than to be with Dave, and maybe one day, he’ll do something about that. But today, he just needs to _be_

So later that afternoon, Klaus finds himself strolling down a busy street with a corporeal Ben by his side as they do some window shopping, visit a few of Klaus’ favorite shops and thrift stores, and even stop by a coffee shop for a snack later in the day. It gets Klaus out of the house and even manages to keep his mind busy for a few hours, but as soon as they return home, he’s right back where he started.

As soon as they get home, Klaus is quick to thank Ben for being there for him that afternoon and insists that he’ll be fine by himself while he makes something to eat. And Klaus does, to his defense, make himself an early dinner as soon as Ben leaves him alone, and he really _does_ intend on retiring to his bedroom shortly after, but it isn’t until he passes by the bar downstairs, looking for something to keep himself busy, something to keep his mind off of Dave, that he remembers something

Back behind the bar, hidden behind old wine bottles that Klaus has yet to touch because _honestly,_ he really doesn’t care for the taste of wine, is a little jar and some rolling papers, long forgotten but likely still there. He remembers leaving it there the day of Reginald’s funeral, a quick little hiding place to stash his weed where no one else would find it, but he never had the chance to go back to it. Not when everything went to shit in the days that followed.

But sure enough, after a little bit of digging, Klaus finds the old stash and, staring up at the jar as he holds it over his head, he already knows what he’s going to do before he does it.

_Sorry, Ben._

* * *

 

“You’re high.” It’s not a question, but is sure as hell sounds like an accusation when Klaus steps foot in his bedroom later that evening. Ben is there, like he always is, sitting on Klaus’ bed, leaning back against the wall. It’s only when Klaus pauses in the doorway that Ben glances up from the book that he’s reading to meet his eyes, but Klaus doesn’t find disappointment or anger hidden there. In fact, he’s not sure _what_ exactly he sees.

Klaus scrubs a hand over his face, running it up and through his hair. “Yeah,” he mutters. “I am, I’m sorry, but -”

“I’m not your keeper,” Ben interrupts before Klaus can fabricate some bullshit lie or excuse. “I just want the best for you, Klaus. But I get that this is hard, and I can’t even begin to imagine what you’re going through right now. So if smoking a little weed is the worst thing that you’re going to do -”

“It is,” Klaus blurts before Ben can finish. “It is, I promise. I just - I knew I had this hidden in the bar and - well, I… _oh, you know.”_

“I do,” Ben mutters. He closes his book and pats the bed, motioning for Klaus to sit next to him. “And I know it’s not something that you can promise, but if you slip into the pills _or anything else_ again, I swear

“I won’t,” Klaus promises. He crosses the room, kicking off his shoes before climbing onto his bed and situating himself next to Ben. “I just - I needed something to take the edge off.”

“I know,” Ben replies, his voice somber. “I get it, I do. But you can come to me, if you need to take your mind off of it, too. Like I said, we’re going to figure this out, okay?”

Klaus nods, letting his eyes slip closed before he tilts his head back, letting it knock against the wall. “Alright,” he mutters. “Alright, yeah. Thank you, Ben. Really.”

“Anytime,” Ben murmurs in response, and Klaus is certain that if he weren’t high, if he were focused and of clear mind, he’d be able to make him corporeal so they could hug or something, but he can’t. Not right now.

So instead, Klaus sighs and mutters, voice small, “I think I need a distraction.”

“Yeah?” Ben asks softly, to which Klaus nods, eyes still closed, head still bumping against the wall. It feels better like this, in the darkness. But he knows he can’t stay this way all night.

“Alright,” Ben says, clearing his throat, “Uh - you think you can pull it together enough for us to play cards or something?”

Then, and only then, Klaus’ eyes flick open and he glances over at Ben, a small smile finding its way onto his lips. “Are you asking me to kick your ass at War right now?”

“I was thinking Speed,” Ben replies with a smile, “But honestly, either works, if you’re game.”

“Yeah,” Klaus says, sitting up a little straighter, “Yeah, I’m pretty sure we can manage that. You’re going _down,_ Benny.”

So that’s how Klaus finds himself sitting cross-legged on his bed about five minutes later, focusing to keep Ben tangible enough to play a childish card game in an effort to keep his mind off of things. And honestly? It actually kind of works. It doesn’t make things _better_ necessarily, but it does manage to keep Klaus busy, even if just for a little bit. As he sits across from his brother, he can’t help the way he laughs when he wins or cries bullshit when Ben kicks his ass a couple times in a row. It’s simple, really, and surprising that _this_ has helped more than anything else, but as he sits in bed, playing cards, he’s eternally grateful for Ben. Ben, who didn’t _have_ to stay by his side all of these years, but has, and continues to no matter how many times he fucks up or how messy everything gets.

He’s not sure how much time goes by after he and Ben start playing cards, but by the time there’s a knock on his bedroom door, Klaus realizes that the sun has long since set, leaving his room illuminated only by a few lamps and some string lights that line the wall. He and Ben share a quick glance at the sound before Klaus swallows and calls out, _“Yeah, come in.”_

He’s certain that it’s just Diego checking on him, as he has every night since Dave disappeared, or maybe it’s Five coming to him with some new development on his current predicament or possibly something entirely unrelated because honestly, he’s never really been the best at reading a room or being empathetic towards others’ struggles. But, when Klaus’ bedroom door creaks open, he’s surprised to find that it’s neither of his brothers standing on the other side.

No, illuminated by the dim light of his bedroom and backlit by the hall light is none other than David Katz, staring at Klaus like he’s afraid that he’ll disappear if he blinks or moves or says a single word. Dave stands there, frozen on the spot, mouth parted as if he’s unsure of what to do or say, and Klaus glances at Ben, just to make sure he’s not _too_ high or dreaming or going crazy and -

 _“Yeah,”_ Ben breathes, “I see him too.”

Klaus is up and moving in an instant, so quickly that he stumbles when he jumps off of his bed and sprints across the room and into Dave’s waiting arms. He doesn’t even hesitate when he launches himself at his lover, knowing in his heart that he’ll be corporeal when he catches him. He has to be, if the love and relief and surprise coursing through Klaus’ veins have anything to say about it. High or not, this moment is too much for him to dull his powers.

And sure enough, Dave catches him, even stumbling backwards slightly with the force of Klaus’ embrace, wrapping his arms tightly around his middle like he’s afraid to let go. Words escape him for a moment, so for the time being, Klaus simply buries his face in Dave’s shoulder, holding onto him for dear life, unable to release him quite yet. In fact, he never wants to let go again.

Finally, after some time has passed, Klaus finds his voice, muttering out wetly against Dave’s solid form, _“Shit, Dave._ I was wondering where you’d been.

Dave exhales against him, pulling his form impossibly closer in response. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs and _god,_ Klaus has missed that voice. Even though it has only been days, it feels like a lifetime since he heard it last. “I wanted to come sooner, I just - I had a few things to do.

Klaus swallows, steeling himself before pulling back slightly to look Dave in the eye, a slight quirk to his lip when he says, “Ah, yeah, _ghost errands.”_

Dave shakes his head, a smile finding its way onto his face and Klaus _knows_ that Dave hates when he makes light of shitty situations like this, but he must have missed him as well, because he lets him get away with it now. Instead, Dave wordlessly steps forward, filling the gap between their bodies again before he dips down, hands on either side of Klaus’ face, and presses a gentle, lingering kiss to his lips.

“I missed you,” Dave murmurs when they part, too close to look Klaus in the eyes, but Klaus doesn’t care.

Klaus lets out a trembling breath, pulling away at last and murmurs, “Yeah, I missed you too.”

Wordlessly, Klaus begins to lead Dave into his bedroom, but he only gets a few steps inside, the door clicking shut behind them, before he’s pausing, step faltering. There are a million things that Klaus wants to say, a million questions he has for Dave, but now that he’s _here -_ and holy shit, Klaus didn’t think he’d ever be able to see him again, so it’s a little bit of a shock, to say the least - he doesn’t know what to say.

They obviously need to have a conversation about _everything,_ because there’s no way that Klaus can just pretend that the past five days didn’t happen, but he doesn’t even know where to start. What is he supposed to say? Of course, he’s grateful that Dave is back, but it leaves so many unanswered questions, so many uncertainties. What if it happens again? What if it’s permanent the next time? Where did Dave go and why didn’t he come back until now?

But Klaus doesn’t ask any of those questions, both because he’s not sure what to ask first and also because, well, he’s still a little high, and he just says the first thing that comes to mind, as unrelated as it may be.

“You knocked on my door,” he mutters mindlessly, turning to face Dave, confusion etched onto his face. In his current state, he’s barely strong enough to keep Ben corporeal enough to play a few card games, let alone make Dave tangible without even realizing it. So that brings up another question. _What’s going on?_

“I did,” Dave replies confidently, as if he knew that Klaus was going to mention it.

Klaus stammers, brain trying to keep up. Meanwhile, behind him on the bed, Ben gazes up at Dave with wide eyes, as if he’s trying to solve the puzzle as well. “But I didn’t - you’re not - I mean -”

“I know,” Dave simply says, which doesn’t answer _anything,_ really, and has Klaus asking even more questions.

“Are you fully corporeal right now?” he asks, taking a few steps toward Dave again, looking him up and down, as if it’ll help him figure it out. “I don’t remember doing this, unless I wasn’t thinking about it, but, look, Dave -”

“Klaus -” Dave starts, but is abruptly cut off.

 _“Holy shit,”_ Klaus exclaims excitedly, “We _have_ to tell Five about this!”

_“Klaus -”_

“Oh man, he’s going to be so excited. I’ve never been able to keep you tangible without thinking about it before and -”

 _“Klaus, stop,”_ Dave commands finally, his voice hard, and finally _that_ is enough to get him to stop talking. “I need to tell you something.”

And Klaus, excited about this new development, absolutely _elated_ that Dave is back and, yeah, still a little high, offers Dave a wide smile, eyes glazed over, “What is it?”

Dave frowns then, the pieces apparently clicking into place in his head. “Are you high?” he asks, and it’s not in an accusatory tone by any means, it’s just a simple question, but it still has Klaus shrinking in on himself, taking a step backwards.

“No. Well, I mean - _yes._ Maybe a little,” Klaus rambles, suddenly very anxious and uneasy and honestly, a little ashamed.

_He couldn’t even make it five days without Dave. Pathetic._

“Shit,” he mutters, and suddenly, it’s all coming out. “Yeah, I uh - I found some weed in the bar. Fuck, Dave. I’m sorry, I know I’ve been good, I just… you weren’t here, and I was kind of freaking out and _I don’t know._ It’s pathetic, I’m sorry, I -”

 _“It’s not pathetic,”_ Dave insists, taking two steps forward to close the gap between them again, reaching out for Klaus’ hands. And Klaus lets him take them, even though he still feels ashamed, even though he feels like curling in on himself. _“You’re_ not. Fuck, Klaus.”

Then, Dave is pulling Klaus forward for another embrace, and somehow, this one is even more emotionally charged than the first. Klaus feels like breaking down like this, held securely in Dave’s arms because he thought that he’d never be able to feel this again, but he holds himself together. He’s hanging by a thread, but he tries to keep it together, pressing his face against Dave’s shoulder while he takes deep, shuddering breaths.

When the wave of emotion eventually subsides, Dave moves, then, reaching with one hand to hook a finger underneath Klaus’ chin to tilt his head up. And time stands still for a moment before he dips down, pressing another kiss to Klaus’ lips.  

“I’m sorry I worried you,” Dave murmurs at last, when they finally part. He’s cradling the back of Klaus’ head with one hand, the other still holding securely onto Klaus’, their fingers laced together. “I’m here now. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Good,” Klaus sighs, feeling his body deflate against Dave’s form. They still have a lot to talk about, but for now, he’s content to stay like this. “Yeah, okay, good. Just… _tell me,_ if you’re gonna.”

“No,” Dave corrects gently, “I’m not leaving. I’m here to stay.”

Klaus smiles, and he knows it’s this sad, pathetic thing, but he can’t help it when he pulls away, just enough to look Dave in the eye. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” he teases gently.

To his surprise, Dave doesn’t have a snappy comeback, nor does he chide Klaus and remind him not to use his humor to deflect the heaviness of the moment. Instead, he simply takes Klaus’ hand and pulls it close, pressing it firmly against his chest. Klaus watches with wide eyes, trying to understand what Dave is doing until he murmurs, voice barely audible, _“Feel.”_

Klaus offers Dave a lazy smile, not quite understanding what he means. “No, I know. _You’re here now,_ but -”

“No, Klaus -” Dave interrupts. He takes Klaus’ hand again, pulling it up to press it up against his neck, guiding his fingers until they’re at the junction of his jaw and throat, searching for his pulse point. _“Feel.”_

While Klaus scrambles to catch up, trying to figure out just exactly what Dave is getting at, Ben seems to already understand. Behind him, Klaus hears his brother gasp.

 _“Holy fucking shit,”_ Ben breathes, _“Dave, can you see me?”_

But if Dave hears or sees Ben, he doesn’t respond. Instead, he just watches Klaus, his eyes searching for the signs of realization that begin to dawn on his features.

_No. No, that’s not possible._

Dave doesn’t say anything, though, even as Klaus blindly reaches out with his other hand, searching for Dave’s wrist, feeling shakily for a pulse.

 _“Klaus,”_ Ben’s voice is just a whisper behind him now, _“Klaus, he’s -”_

And beneath his fingers, Klaus can feel the rapid _thump, thump, thump_ of a racing heart.

_But that doesn’t make sense. He’s not - he can’t be._

“No...” Klaus mutters mindlessly, taking a step back to properly look at Dave with wide, disbelieving eyes. “No, but you’re… you’re dead - you can’t -”

Dave offers him a smile, and it’s the most beautiful, the most heartbreaking thing he’s ever seen. He doesn’t try to follow Klaus as he backs away, trying to comprehend what’s happening, but instead, just offers a reassuring, stunning smile, a few silent tears falling from bright blue eyes and slipping down his cheeks.

“No,” Dave whispers at last, “I’m not.”

“But - but -” Klaus stammers, disbelieving, “I watched you - you _died,_ Dave. I watched you _die._ I conjured you… I don’t understand.”

“Five,” Dave replies softly. Now, when he takes a step forward, reaching for Klaus’ hands again, Klaus remains stock still as he closes the gap, body shuddering as soon as their fingertips touch.

“He went back, with an amended version of the serum that your father gave Luther,” Dave explains, “I’m not quite sure how, but one moment, I was here, next to you, and the next, I was... well -”

 _“Alive,”_ Klaus rasps, his voice barely above a whisper. He’s not quite sure that he believes the words coming out of his own mouth, but he wants to. _God,_ does he want to. “You’re really alive?” he asks, his own voice sounding small in his ears.

“I am,” Dave breathes, and the tears are flowing freely now.

And _god,_ he looks beautiful.

That’s all it really takes before Klaus is practically falling forward once more into Dave’s waiting, sturdy arms. And now, this time, Klaus takes _all_ of him in: the warmth of his chest, the clean smell of his clothes, the way his breath stutters as he pulls Klaus close, and of course, the sturdy sound of his beating of his heart, faint but certainly there when Klaus presses his ear against Dave’s chest for good measure. Dave’s really alive - _he’s really here_ \- and Klaus can’t believe it. Things like this... well, they don’t happen to someone like Klaus. Always unlucky, always drawing the short straw, it’s with a heavy weight in his chest that Klaus worries that there might be a catch, that this isn’t permanent, that Dave will disappear as soon as he closes his eyes and this will all be a dream. A perfect, painful dream.

“Fuck, this isn’t real, this is a dream,” Klaus mutters to himself, as if it’ll help him wake up before this becomes even more bittersweet.

But he doesn’t wake up.

“It’s not,” Dave insists gently, fingers carding through Klaus’ messy hair as he speaks, the other hand holding him close at the small of his back. _“God,_ it feels like one, but it’s not. This is _real,_ Klaus.”

 _“Fuck,”_ Klaus bites again, voice thick. He wants to believe this, he really does, but he has to be sure. “What’s the catch? There’s gotta be a catch. How do you know that you’re - I mean, that you’re here to stay?” He’s rambling now, desperate and scared, but Dave remains sturdy against him.

“Five ran some tests to make sure there are no… complications,” Dave answers finally. It’s only then that he eventually pulls away, holding Klaus at arms length while he explains, “I wanted to come to you sooner… _I swear,_ I would have, but we wanted to be sure that this was permanent. That I was here to stay.”

 _“Shit,”_ Klaus mutters then, breathless. “So you mean, Five knew? He -”

“Don’t be angry with him,” Dave interrupts, voice soft, “He didn’t go about it the right way, but he was just trying to help.”

And it’s at _that_ exact moment that Klaus realizes that _no,_ this isn’t a dream, because only in real life could his brother be such a clueless idiot, but a genius all at the same time.

“That little shit,” Klaus hisses, but he can’t help the way his lips curl up into a smile, suddenly giddy with relief and excitement and disbelief. It’s a wild feeling, and it has tears welling up in his eyes, despite the way the tries to rein in his emotions.

“You’re alive,” Klaus breathes again, the reality of the situation finally hitting him. “You’re really alive - you’re -”

“I am,” Dave repeats, a smile falling across his face, and at that, Klaus is collapsing into his arms again, this time unable to hold back the choked out sob that works its way from his throat, because in an instant, an entire lifetime of hopes and dreams and plans that Klaus had buried ages ago when he buried Dave seems entirely possible again. If this is real, if he’s really alive and here to stay, then anything is possible.

They can finally start a life together, finally see the world together… they can finally do all of the stupid, little mundane things they talked about a lifetime ago, back in Vietnam when it was just a pipe dream, like getting a dog _and_ a cat to fill their homey little cabin nestled in the middle of the mountains. Hell, Klaus could _marry_ Dave if he wanted to, and it’s something they’ve never talked about, but Klaus knows, as he clings onto Dave now like he never wants to let go, that if Dave asked, he’d say yes. A million times, he’d say yes.

* * *

 

 

**TWO YEARS LATER**

 

_“Klaus.”_

At thirty-three years old (give or take a couple of years, with the time he spent in Vietnam coupled with the time in the pocket universe) Klaus has become used to the voices that call out to him in the night. As much as he suppresses them, be it with liquor or drugs as he did when he was younger, or by controlling and mastering his powers over the past few years, they’re always still there in some way shape or form. Always following. Always watching, begging for help, calling his name. Only now, they’re just a distant rumble, a slight ringing in his ears that’s easy to overlook on good days, and only mildly annoying on most bad ones.

_“Hey, Klaus.”_

The city harbors the most condensed amount of restless spirits, but out in the countryside, upstate, things are a little quieter. Sure, they’re never truly gone, but some days, Klaus sometimes actually forgets that he even has those powers, that he can hear the ghosts calling out to him if he listens close enough. Obviously, Ben is the exception - he always will be - but even now, after so many years, Klaus sometimes forgets that Ben isn’t alive. Not when he’s able to make him corporeal more often than not.

_“Come on, get up Klaus. You have a big day ahead of you.”_

Oh. Right.

The voice calling out to him now _isn’t_ one of those restless spirits, though. No, as Klaus cracks an eye open, morning light flooding his vision and forcing him to throw an arm lazily over his face, he realizes that the voice isn’t coming from a ghost in his peripheral or a specter in his dream.

No, lying next to him in the warm morning light is none other than Dave, a lazy smile spread across his face as he leans forward, peppering kisses across Klaus’ arm before pulling it away from his face and replacing it with his lips.

Klaus groans, turning his head away from Dave despite the smile that begins to spread across his face. “C’mon, just five more minutes,” he mutters groggily, eyes still squeezed shut, as if it’ll stop him from waking up.

“That’s what you said yesterday, and we ended up spending all afternoon in bed,” Dave argues gently, but Klaus can practically _hear_ the smile in his voice.

Klaus huffs. “You weren’t complaining,” he shoots back, which earns a chuckle from Dave.

“No,” Dave agrees, voice gentle, “I wasn’t, but we have company coming over, and I’m not doing all the work by myself.”

Klaus groans again, finally cracking his eyes open, squinting against the early morning sunlight before his vision finally focuses on Dave, hovering over him. He drinks in the sight of his lover leaning over him in bed, shirtless, hair still damp from the shower, a smile spread across his face, reaching up all the way to touch his bright blue eyes. _God,_ sometimes Klaus forgets that he’s real.

“Y’know, the whole shirtless thing isn’t helping your _get out of bed, Klaus,_ case,” he mutters at last, shooting a sleepy smirk up at Dave, who simply shakes his head in response.

“While I’d _love_ to spend the day in bed with you, we have a busy day ahead of us,” Dave argues softly. “Besides, _you_ told me to wake you up early.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Klaus grumbles. He reaches up, pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes as if it’ll help him wake up faster. “Give me a couple of minutes.”

Dave nods then, leaning down to press a kiss to Klaus’ forehead, then another chaste one to his lips, lingering for a moment before pulling away. “Five minutes,” he agrees, “Or I’m dumping a bucket of water on you.”

“You wouldn’t _dare,”_ Klaus hisses in response, eyes narrowed, but the hard look that Dave shoots him says otherwise.

“Try me.”

So, three minutes later, that’s how Klaus finds himself begrudgingly climbing out of bed. Still groggy from sleep, he swings his legs over the edge of their bed before padding softly across the room to retrieve a pair of Dave’s loose-fitting black joggers before stretching and heading out of the room. While Klaus is not necessarily a morning person, he can’t deny that he loves the way that the early morning sunlight makes their home look absolutely angelic in the morning, the warm tones causing the exposed wood and hand-carved furniture to practically glow. It’s like something out of a dream, he thinks, but only because he dreamt of it before.

Klaus appreciates the look now, even half-awake, as he walks quietly down the hallway and eventually, down the stairs and into the main level of the house, where he can smell Dave cooking breakfast and _god,_ how did he wind up so lucky?

Downstairs, the morning light looks just as beautiful, if not more so, as it did in their bedroom. The large picture window, which stretches from floor to ceiling in the living room on the west wall, allows for the maximum amount of natural light to filter through the main level of the house, rendering lamps and ceiling lights almost unnecessary at this hour. And, when Klaus steps into the kitchen, the early light illuminates a banner that hangs across the wooden pillars on either side of the room, reading in big, colorful letters: _HAPPY BIRTHDAY._

Klaus pauses in front of the banner, eyeing it with both amusement and annoyance. Over the past few years, he has told Dave time and time again _not_ to make a big deal out of his birthday, something that he quickly grew to resent as a child and still doesn’t necessarily care for to this day. It’s hard to celebrate a day that ended up dictating the majority of his life, afterall.

But, just a few feet away from the obnoxious banner, there Dave stands, whipping together what smells like a fantastic _birthday_ breakfast, as if he has completely forgotten about it. And _fuck,_ Klaus really can’t be mad at him about it, can he?

“The banner is cheesy,” Klaus comments in lieu of a greeting as he steps into the kitchen.

“I know,” Dave replies, a fond smile settling on his face, “But it’s all they had at the store, and I wanted to do _something_ festive.”

Klaus huffs out a quiet laugh. “Of course you did,” he comments, taking a seat at the kitchen bar and watching as Dave flips a pancake on the griddle. “Need help with anything?”

“No,” Dave replies easily, glancing up at Klaus then, shooting him a smile. “It’s your birthday. You’re not lifting a finger.”

 _“Bullshit,”_ Klaus shoots back, “You just guilted me into getting up because you didn’t want to _do all the work by yourself.”_

Dave chuckles, turning back to the griddle. “I did. And I _do_ still need your help getting everything ready for this afternoon, but for now, I’m making you breakfast. Let me have this.”

Klaus rolls his eyes in response, but he doesn’t argue. Instead, he just watches as Dave finishes putting together the perfect breakfast spread, complete with pancakes, bacon, eggs and toast. And as he watches Dave move throughout _their_ kitchen, he can’t help but think back to just a couple of years ago, when something like this seemed impossible. He never thought he could have anything like _this,_ yet here Dave is, standing in their kitchen, in _their_ home, making him breakfast nearly fifty-five years after the day they first met.

It’s insane, really, when you think about it that way. Klaus never thought he’d be here. Even just a few years ago, it seemed like a pipe dream. Hell, even a year ago, when he and Dave first began looking for their own place together, it still hadn’t fully sunk in.

But now, sitting in the kitchen in _their_ homey little cabin upstate, watching as Dave makes him the perfect _birthday breakfast,_ it finally feels real.

The cabin had been a bit of a fixer-upper when they first found it, but it was worth the hard work that they put into it. It wasn’t all that pretty on the outside, but absolutely gorgeous on the inside ( _just like me,_ Klaus thought, but didn’t say upon the first time stepping inside) and now, it truly feels like _home._ And only a two hour drive away from the Academy and the city, Klaus is still close enough to see Diego and Five, and sometimes even Vanya, on a regular basis, but it’s far enough away for them to begin to build a life of their own, far away from the painful memories of a shitty childhood and The Umbrella Academy.

After breakfast, Klaus helps Dave do the dishes, then assists in cleaning up the house a little bit before prepping dinner. It seems ridiculous to be getting ready so early, but Dave had _insisted,_ so Klaus couldn’t argue.

By around two in the afternoon, Klaus finally retreats back up to their bedroom to shower and get dressed himself, before joining Dave back downstairs. And by then, the entire house is filled with the sweet smell of the chocolate cake that Dave insisted they bake, mixed with whatever delicious dish he’s currently making for dinner. It’s… so ridiculously mundane, in a way that Klaus never thought he’d ever experience, and he absolutely _loves_ it.

Normally, Klaus lives for long showers and relaxing baths, but with company coming soon and Dave still getting ready downstairs, Klaus hurries through washing himself and changing into a clean pair of clothes. It’s something modest, for him, but the green top still shows a sliver of his midriff, the tight black pants hanging low on his hips, all pulled together by a sheer black kimono.

Some things change. _Some things never do,_ he thinks, as he walks out of the bathroom, fingers brushing against the dog tags that hang on the wall next to the mirror as he goes.

By the time Klaus descends back to the main level of the house again, the angelic morning glow is long gone, but the novelty hasn’t worn out. Even in mid-afternoon light, the cabin looks like an absolute _dream,_ all warm tones, tall ceilings, large windows, beautiful furniture and the occasional framed photo of Klaus or Dave’s family. It’s their _home,_ and every time Klaus lets himself stop and take it all in, he’s overwhelmed by the reality of it all.

Like now, as he pauses at the bottom of the stairs, taking in the calm, peaceful sight.

When he eventually turns, it’s to find Dave, standing in the kitchen leaning slightly on the counter, staring at him with love in his eyes. Klaus smiles at the look, one he knows _very_ well by now, and takes a few steps forward. “Can I help you?” he asks, a teasing hint to his voice.

“You look stunning,” Dave murmurs reverently, and Klaus chuckles.

“Oh, _this old thing?”_ he asks, a smile pulling at his lips as he motions at his olive green crop-top and kimono. Truthfully, he knows that it’s one of Dave’s favorite shirts on him. _It brings out your eyes,_ Dave always tells him, as he takes his face in his hands and kisses him softly.

It’s no different now, as Dave crosses the room, one hand eventually finding Klaus’ hip while the other comes to rest gently on his cheek. And, like he did a lifetime ago, when they shared their first kiss, Klaus leans easily into the touch, his eyes falling closed.

Kisses between Klaus and Dave are no longer a rare occurrence, stolen between jeeps, hidden in the dark cover of night or treated as a gift whenever Klaus is able to keep him corporeal long enough to share a moment of intimacy. No, now, they come freely and easy, like now, when Dave leans in, a gentle press of lips, a dance of fingers across skin and a soft sigh from Klaus when they eventually part. Klaus certainly doesn’t take it for granted - he doesn’t take _anything_ about this life with Dave for granted - but _god,_ it’s nice to be able to kiss his boyfriend like this and not have to worry about someone seeing them or Dave disappearing from his grasp.

When they eventually part, it’s with Klaus’ fingers raking through Dave’s hair and down his body, a soft chuckle on his lips. Dave offers him a small smile in return. “What is it?”

“Just… _this,”_ Klaus says with a shrug, glancing over Dave’s shoulder at their home as if to show what he means. “Did you ever think we’d end up here, all those years ago?”

“Well honestly, _no,”_ Dave replies, his hand leaving Klaus’ hip in favor of searching out his fingers, lacing them together after a moment. Klaus knows what he means - he never could have anticipated _this_ when they first met back in Vietnam, but it’s better than anything he could have hoped for. “But _god,_ I’m so glad that we did.”

“Yeah,” Klaus murmurs, “Me too.”

And that’s all it takes before they’re kissing again, this time a little more passionately, both men soaking in this perfect moment together, after everything they’ve been through. Honestly, Klaus would be okay if this kiss lasted forever, too. Maybe, they could just say _fuck all of their plans_ and spend the rest of the day like this. _Together._ That wouldn’t be so bad, right?

Only a few moments later, though, they’re interrupted by a knock on the front door, followed by the sound of muffled voices just outside.

Klaus reluctantly pulls away from Dave at that, closing his eyes. A fond, albeit annoyed smile finds its way onto his face. _“Fucking cockblocks,”_ he mutters to himself, earning a chuckle from Dave

“Do you want me to -”

“Nah, I’ll get it,” Klaus replies, leaning forward to press another quick kiss to Dave’s lips.

There’s another knock at the door as Klaus pulls away, and as he approaches the front door, he calls out, _“Yeah, I’m coming!_

The front door swings open only a few seconds later, and on the other side stand Klaus’ siblings, all together again for the first time in well… nearly a year, he supposes. And for the first time in a long time, seeing the five of them - six, if he includes Ben, who already sits patiently in the living room - on the other side of the door, Klaus doesn’t feel anxious or remorseful or angry. No, instead, he actually kind of feels like a kid again, excited to spend the night with the people he loves the most.

“Hey guys,” he says in greeting, a warm smile finding its way onto his face, “Happy birthday.”

Later, long after dinner and cake and a long night of talking shit and catching up with his siblings, Klaus _finally_ gets some much needed _alone_ time with Dave, which ends in their bed with tangled limbs, gentle touches, soft sighs and lingering kisses. And as they lay there together, basking in the afterglow, Klaus can’t help but remember a time like this, not too long ago, when he had asked Dave, teasingly of course, what he’d dream about, if he could, back when he was still a ghost, back when Klaus never thought a life like this was possible.

And yeah, it was a pretty mundane dream, this quiet little life they’ve carved out for themselves here, but _god,_ is it perfect.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, here's the thing. When I first started working on this final piece of this series, the whole "cabin in the mountains" idea wasn't even something that I had thought of. Then, Dave's little dream came to me, and all the sudden I had all of these headcanons about Klaus and Dave talking about this dream cabin when they were in Vietnam, and I REALLY regretted not adding it in the very first part of the series to make this feel a little more "full circle". That's what I get for posting this as I write it, I guess, haha. 
> 
> I'm also super glad I got to wiggle some more Klaus & Ben moments in here because I definitely didn't do as much as I would have liked earlier in this fic. (Also I know Ben isn't the best at talking Klaus down and probably didn't say the right things that someone would need to hear in that situation, but he's not perfect and he's definitely frustrated, so go easy on him.)
> 
> Anyway, because of that, I DEFINITELY didn't plan on this monster of a final chapter, but it kind of just happened. Go figure. I also thought about making the little epilogue a separate chapter all together, but honestly didn't feel like extending this fic any further and making you all wait, so instead, there's just a ton of words here. Sorry not sorry. 
> 
> Again, thank you so SO much to anyone who has read, shared, commented, bookmarked or given kudos. I had so much fun creating this little world and it's really bittersweet that it's all over.
> 
> I'm DEFINITELY planning on writing more for this fandom/ship in the future. If you ever feel like chatting or keeping up with my ramblings, feel free to hit me up on Tumblr! [tumblr.com/thefangirlingdead](http://thefangirlingdead.tumblr.com)

**Author's Note:**

> Alright. So!
> 
> First off, I KNOW it's a huge jump in time from the last part to this one (which leaves lots of room for later installations if I'm feeling up for it!) but I really didn't feel like it was necessary to go too much into the detail about HOW they save the world, because that's not really what this fic is about. Also, that would have been a TON to write, and I'm lazy haha. 
> 
> Second, HOLY SHIT, FIVE! Am I right?? DISCUSS. 
> 
> And third, I'm still working on the next two chapters, which means updates might be kind of slow... BUT if there's anything you want to see in those, feel free to let me know! 
> 
> Also, I always find a way to work the Lord of the Rings into my fics. Sorry not sorry, they're my favorite movies and I have to project that onto every character I write, apparently. 
> 
> As always, feel free to drop me a line on Tumblr. http://thefangirlingdead.tumblr.com


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